Page 49 of Falling for Autumn Again

I’m doing the math in my head. It isn’t difficult—and she knows it. Ed was sick for five years. He’s been gone for five years. I’m not the brightest man in the world, but five and five is ten. That means all this started right when I left.

I hold her shoulders in my hands and study her face, certain it will tell me more. “When did you find out?”

She stares, and while her lips are a pretty shade of purple, they’ve at least stopped quivering.

“When?” I hold her tighter, pressing for an answer.

“Graduation night. After you dropped me off. I heard my parents talking.”

I shut my eyes, my heart thundering in my ears. Memories of that night run through my brain in fast-forward, moments that I’ve played over and over again in my head. And yet for the first time in ten years, I am seeing things clearly.

“So, you stayed.”

She nods, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. Her expression speaks volumes. It says—I had to.It says—there was no other choice.

“You had to,” I say for her. She didn’twantto. Shehadto.

My hands rise to her cheeks, holding her there, searching her eyes for something, anything. Warmth radiates between our two bodies. I feel it, despite the wet T-shirt on my back and the clinging, cold sweats stuck to my legs.

I move in slowly, depleting the space between us.Autumn. I trace my thumb beneath her eye, feeling whole for the first time in a decade. My body has been lacking some serious sustenance—and this is it.

“Autumn,” I whisper, my entire body aching for her. Her eyes flutter closed, and a force so much stronger than my will relieves me of all my pain and anguish as I lean in and brush my lips to hers for the first time in a very long time.

Ten years ago, I held the gold medal for kissing Autumn Green, but this is different. She’s different. She isn’t a carefree kid anymore and neither is this kiss.

She lifts on her toes and the blanket around her falls over one bare shoulder. She holds it tight at her neck, pulling it back into place while never allowing our lips to lose contact.

Her mouth moves with mine, her breath warm, her tongue sweet.

Oh, how I’ve missed her.

I wrap my arms around her back, hugging her close andlifting her off her feet—all while reacquainting our lips. My kisses trail over her slender jaw and up to her soft earlobe. I hold her tight and bury my face in her neck, breathing in the sugar and vanilla that’s always made up Autumn’s scent.

My lips graze along her neck and collarbone—I’m a starving man, being fed for the first time in years. “I’ve missed you,” I say.

I'm not sure which one of those three little words sets her off, but Autumn goes rigid in my arms. And then she kicks, her legs swishing like a windup toy in the tub. Her hands flatten against my chest, attempting to put space between us.

“Put me down!” She flicks my chest with her fingers and I obey, dropping her onto her feet. She stumbles back with my release, almost losing her footing.

“You okay?” I hold out a hand, but she doesn’t take it.

And suddenly she’s got her voice back—no trembling lips, no shivering body, though she has to be cold still. She’s currently invoking loud, proud, and in charge. “You can’t just pick me up, Ezra.” She shakes her head. “You can’t just kiss me.” Her arms thrust down, her hands shaking out at the wrists. Her blanket slips off the edge of her shoulders and she snatches it up. “We don’t kiss anymore!”

I tilt my head. “Clearly, wecan. We still have the ability. We justhaven’tin a while.”

She glowers, not finding me funny at all. “I’m sitting over here to wait out the storm. You keep your distance.” A low, heavy breath falls from her chest as she tosses out another blanket onto a bare section of the cement floor. Finding a perch on the hard ground, she drapes her original blanket over her body. She lies back and rolls onto her side—away from me.

Well, that was a quick change of pace.

I run my hand beneath my chin and over the stubble there, my breathing haggard. She can tell me to stay away tonight. She can roll away from me and not spare me one glance. But the factis, she didn't push me away a decade ago because she didn't want me. She didn'tchooseto stay behind. She didn’t want us to separate back then. In true Autumn fashion, she was saving me. She was saving everyone. And tonight, as she finally spoke her truth, she most certainly kissed me back.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Autumn

I feelEzra settle to the ground next to me. I'd yell at him, but there isn't anywhere else for him to sit. Besides, yelling at him would mean turning around to face him. And I can't do that. For the first time since my father died, my stupid eyes won't stop leaking.

Dad died, and for a month, I sobbed daily. I cried until there was no moisture left inside of my body to cry. I couldn’t muster another tear. My eyes were drier than dust.

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