Page 82 of Alpha Jax

After a moment, I draw a breath, cautiously returning my gaze to Theo. “Look, I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but what Quinn and I have… it’s different. I’ve never felt this way before.”

My voice is gravelly, my hands are clammy. It feels so fucking weird to be confessing this to Theo, of all people, but he needs to hear it. If I’m going to get him to come around, he needs to know this isn’t just a casual thing for me. He’s used to me telling him about my random hookups, and he needs to know that this isn’t one of those, not by a longshot. It’s the real deal.

“And I know it was shitty for us to sneak around rather than telling you about it,” I sigh. “I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t stop myself. Like I said, things are different with her, man. I wanna be with her,only her.”

Theo starts to move toward me and I flinch, unsure if he’s going to attack again. Something shifts in his gaze, though. His tough exterior is slipping, his well-concealed vulnerability seeping through the cracks. He suddenly looks less murder-y and more like the guy who agonized over buying a jacket for the girl he liked.

I stay rooted to the spot I’m standing in as Theo walks around the bench, coming up beside me and sinking down onto it. He leans forward and puts his head in his hands. I just keep standing there like an idiot for a few seconds, unsure what to do as I stare down at the top of his head. His hair is a rich chocolate brown, the same color as Quinn’s. Each time I notice their similarities I kick myself for not picking up on them that first night- but then again, if I had, I might’ve missed out on the best thing. Slowly, I turn around and sink down beside him, staring out at the pond.

Theo picks up his head, gazing into the pond when he speaks again. “Listen, I only agreed to meet up with you tonight because my sister said she has feelings for you.”

My chest tightens, my heart pounding against my ribcage. When I put it all out there for Quinn, she never had a chance to respond and say whether she felt the same way. Now Theo’s providing confirmation that she does- and I’m suddenly finding it a little hard to breathe.

“As fucked up as this whole thing is, I’m not gonna stand in the way if you two want to be together,” he continues, his voice low. “I’m just trying to look out for my sister. I’m trying to figure out how to be there for her now since I haven’t been for the past five years. And I’m not gonna lie, it was hard seeing her so upset this week, even harder when I found out someone I trusted was the one who made her feel like that.”

This is a side of Theo that people rarely get to see. He’s not just a foul-mouthed hothead, he’s got deep trauma and emotions that he keeps expertly hidden from all except those closest to him. I’ve only gotten a peek behind the curtain a few times, but understanding Theo has helped me understand his sister- they’re more alike than either of them realize.

“Our whole falling out happened because I wanted to come clean to you about us and Quinn didn’t,” I supply. “She’s so afraid that you’ll walk away again, Theo. She needs to know that she can screw up and that you’ll still be her brother, that you’ll still be there for her.”

Theo grunts, his throat working as he swallows hard. “She should know that already.”

“Maybe,” I shrug, “but it wouldn’t hurt to remind her. Trust me, I’ve got sisters. You can never assume anything when it comes to women”.

He nods, and another silence settles between us. This one isn’t tense or uncomfortable, though- it’s peaceful. Like we’ve come to some modicum of understanding.

After a minute or two, I heave a sigh, leaning back on the bench and glancing over at my friend. “I really am sorry, bro. I should’ve just come to you about this from the beginning rather than sneaking around behind your back.”

Theo side-eyes me. “Would’ve saved some fucked up conversations.” He suddenly grimaces like something just occurred to him, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Dude, I heard her through your door that one time…”

I wince at the memory. “I know. I’m sorry.”

There’s another pause, after which Theo sighs, turning to look at me. “I’ll get over it eventually. Just… if you’re gonna keep seeing my sister, you need to do right by her. Otherwise I really will kill you.”

I chuckle wryly, though I doubt he’s joking. “You don’t have to worry about that, man. If she’ll have me, I’ll make her happy.” I smile thinking of Quinn, of how incredible she is and of how invincible I feel when I’m with her. “Like I said, I’ve never felt this way with anyone. I feel like a piece of me is missing without her. I think she could be my mate.”

That gets his attention. Theo’s eyebrows shoot up, and I can’t believe I just admitted that out loud. The thought has crossed my mind a few times, but I’ve never vocalized it, afraid that if I put it out into the universe it might not come true. But fuck it- all bets are off, now. I just got as close to a blessing as I’m gonna get from Theo, removing the largest obstacle standing between me and Quinn. It’s time to get my girl, for real this time.

Theo blows out a breath, leaning forward and rising to his feet from the bench. He turns to me, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets again and flicking his head to beckon me. “Come on, then.”

“Huh?” I blink.

For the first time since he arrived here to meet me, the hint of a smile forms on Theo’s lips. “Well if you honestly feel that strongly about Quinn and you think you’re mates, you’d better come see her so you two can figure your shit out before the full moon.”

“Yeah?” I spring to my feet, my voice dripping in enthusiasm. I quickly rein it in, composing myself. “I mean, you’re okay with that?”

“Well yeah, if you guys are mates and I keep you apart I’ll look like a real douchebag, won’t I?” His lips curl into a smirk.

I chuckle, clapping him on the back. “Yeah, just a little. But thanks, man. Really. I know it may take some time for things to go back to normal between us, but I appreciate that you’re willing to look past this for now…”

Theo rolls his eyes, slapping on his cocky mask again. “Just shut up and point me in the direction of your truck. You’re giving me a ride.”

I start forward, gesturing for him to follow. “Where’s your bike, anyways? Don’t tell me it’s broken again.”

“Nah, left it at the complex. Drove Quinn’s car back.”

I snort, picturing Theo behind the wheel of Quinn’s tiny vehicle. “You’re joking, right? How the hell did you fit in that thing?”

“It wasn’t easy,” he grumbles. “My knees were practically on the dash.”

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