Page 82 of Wicked Devotions

My chest expands with the foreign warmth of happiness at seeing them express their affection for each other so openly. Emerson looks at me, and I see my own feelings reflected back at me inhis eyes. I remember Sawyer talking to me about this feeling: compersion is what it’s called.

For the first time in a long time, I feel settled.

When they break apart, her cheeks are flushed, and she avoids eye contact with any of us. Cy looks at her with absolute adoration. I’ve never seen him look so happy.

“Let’s get the jeep loaded up.” Emerson pauses to point at me. “Except you. You take it fucking easy. I shouldn’t even let you walk out there.”

“You gonna carry me?” I taunt but then slap his shoulder when he looks like he might actually be considering it. “Fuck off.”

“If he couldn’t, I could,” Cy adds.

I mean, he’s not wrong. He might be the shortest of us, but he’s definitely the strongest.

“No one’s fucking carrying me. I’m fine.”

The three of them share a look but don’t say anything else on the subject. It takes a lot of effort, but I refrain from grabbing any of the boxes or bags to take out with them. Instead, I just follow along sullenly.

“It’s okay to let other people do the heavy lifting sometimes,” Harper says quietly to me.

“You’re one to talk.”

“I let you guys help me all the time.” She scrunches up her nose in true confusion, and it’s the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.

“You won’t let us pay for you.” I run my finger over the bridge of her nose, smoothing out the wrinkles.

“That’s different. I can’t rely on another man in my life to take care of me. I have to find my own way.”

“You can rely on us.”

She sighs and shakes her head. “It’s not that simple.”

But before I can respond, she’s climbing into the back seat beside Cy and looking in the opposite direction of me. Regardless, I get in the seat in front of her and reach back to hook my hand around her smooth calf.

Part of me wishes it was just going to be the four of us out here tonight. Actually, all of me if I’m being honest. The last thing I want to do is put on my bullshit party boy facade and act like I enjoy these parties. I don’t. Before Harper the parties were how I found girls to fuck for a night, just a quick way to get off and release tension. Don’t get me wrong, I made sure any of my partners enjoyed themselves. I'm anasshole, but I’m not selfish. It just never left the clearing.

Unfortunately, I’m not the only one who has regular hookups out here. Most of the regulars will find someone to hook up with out in the trees. Some nights it was damn near an orgy around here. I can’t help but worry about Harper.

I was so grateful to have Saylor and Lou here last time. They were a perfect buffer, but they’re at a wedding in Virginia this weekend, so if she wanders off, one of us will need to follow her. I’m not sure how well that will go over.

Emerson drives us as close as he can possibly get to the clearing. Luckily the jeep has good clearance, so it’s not too hard to get a few hundred feet farther into the forest. We bounce along the trail until the trees become too close to navigate through.

Cy jumps over the side and starts helping Emerson grab everything for the night. Meanwhile I hold the door open for Harper and extend my hand for her grab to steady herself. I close the door behind her and slide my hand around hers, linking our fingers and start leading her through the trees. She’s only been here once, I don’t want her getting lost.

“What are you going to do with this land?” she asks.

“Good question. Lately I’ve been thinking about building a house out here. It might be nice to have somewhere secluded to escape to.”

The last rays of the sunlight filter through the green canopy above leaving the world around us dappled in gold and green light reminiscent of the color of her eyes. She’s suited for the forest with the nymph-like delicacy of her features and the innocence of her spirit. I can easily imagine her riding her horses through the trees, a smile on her face with a ribbon in her hair.

“Do you want to stay down here?” Her question pulls me back to reality. “I would have thought you’d want to move back north.”

“Eventually I want to take my mother’s place at her family’s business, which would mean moving back to Boston at least some of the time. But I’m not opposed to keeping a place in South Carolina.” I turn and take in her profile. “What about you? Anywhere you see yourself going?”

“Honestly? I’ve never thought about anything beyond what I always anticipated being my life. It hurt to dream.”

The urge to stop and drag her into my arms is almost impossible to resist but more than comforting her, I want her to know she’s safe toopen up to me. But fuck if that isn’t the most painful confession I’ve ever heard.

“You can dream all you want now.”

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