Twelve
LUKE
* * *
All day the guys have been looking at me sideways like I’ve grown two heads. Right now, Sam and Colt are mucking the stalls across from me, and I can hear them whispering, but I can’t make out the details of what they’re saying. I’m not usually one for chatting, but my curiosity gets the best of me.
“Are you two going to let me in on the details of what you’re gossiping about?” I finally ask.
Sam pops his head out of the stall door. “What?”
“I can hear you two whispering about something over there like a couple of school girls.”
“We were just talking about how Eli looked today. Did you see those shorts?” Colt says as he wiggles his brows. “I might have to risk my job for a chance with that.”
“No.” My good mood sours immediately. “You don’t have a chance in hell. And if you keep talking about her like a piece of ass, you’ll find yourself unemployed.”
“I knew it,” he exclaims, crossing to the stall I’m in. “What’s going on between you two?”
“Nothing.”
“Bullshit.” Sam joins us in the small space. “I can see it all over your face.”
“And we saw you follow her into the goat barn.”
“I was just making sure she didn’t need help with hay.”
“Because tossing a bale of hay into a feeder for some goats is hard?”
“She’s still pretty green.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“I don’t buy it. She’s already doing stuff around here that most take a year to learn.”
“You don’t have to buy it.” I shrug and go back to cleaning out and taking inventory of the grooming stall. A couple of the boarders have shows coming up, so we want to make sure everything is good to go for them.
They stand there and watch me until I look back up at them.
“Go back to work.”
“Listen, we just want you to know that if there is something going on with you, we’re happy for you,” Sam says.
“Yeah, man. It’s okay to let yourself be happy.” Colt slaps my shoulder before they both walk back to finish working.
They’re not far off the mark. I’m struggling with guilt, both from wanting another woman for the first time since losing Amy. But also sneaking around with Paul’s granddaughter. He and Jo have been nothing short of amazing to me over the years, from giving me time to grieve, dealing with my surly attitude, and letting me build a cabin on their land.
At the same time when I’m with her, I feel alive instead of just living. I see little pieces of me falling back into place, even if there are still a few shards missing. It’s not like I don’t miss Amy, and I’m obviously not replacing her. I could never.
Plus, I made myself very clear at the outset with Eli. This is only a summer thing. She gets it and agrees, so why not let myself actually enjoy it while it lasts?
Two hours later, and I’m still hanging out in the stables organizing the tack room for the third time while I wait to watch Eli leave with Jo. The sound of feet crunching over gravel makes me look up just in time to see Paul walking my way. Jo and Eli walk arm in arm out to Jo’s car and take off a moment later.
“Girls’ night?” I ask him with a nod in the girls’ direction.
“Yep. Apparently they want to catch up and get their nails done before grabbing dinner in town. Girl talk, I’m guessing.”
“Is something wrong?”
“I don’t think so. Jo said she was sad this morning about her parents not reaching out much.” He scoffs and shakes his head. “I don’t understand how my son can have such an amazing daughter and just be so checked out. Him and his wife. If we could have convinced them to let us have her here with us, it would have been better all around.”