Page 17 of Promise Me Never

“Is he good in bed?”

I draw a deep breath. “Well, we haven’t had sex yet, but everything else we’ve done has been amazing.”

“Are you waiting for marriage or something?”

“No. He’s had sex. He just doesn’t want to be my first.”

“What?” Her brows pinch as she leans back in the booth. “Why?”

“That’s the thing, he never gives me an answer when I ask.”

“The red flags are flying. I don’t like that. Not one bit.”

“I don’t either, and to be honest, I’d really like to just get it over with. It’s actually a goal of mine this summer.”

“To sleep with someone?”

“Yeah.”

“Because you want to go be in a relationship with this other guy?”

“Honestly, no. I don’t even know if anything will develop between us. It’s really just about me exploring my sexuality. I wasn’t sheltered by my parents in the usual sense, but I didn’t have a normal childhood either. They expected me to excel academically, and I didn’t want to let them down, so instead of going to pool parties, I was at the library. Instead of going to school dances, I was following them to guest lectures around the country. I feel like my social life has been stunted because of that.”

She nods slowly as she takes a drink. “That makes sense. What are you looking for in your encounter this summer?”

“Respect, obviously.” I shrug. “Ideally, they’d be attractive, and there’d be a spark of chemistry. I’m truly not looking for anything serious. I’d be fine with a one-night stand, to be honest.”

“Sam? Or Colton? I’m sure they wouldn’t mind offering their services.”

They’re both flirty and sweet, but I’ve noticed disapproving glares from Luke when I’m with either of them. “I think I should steer clear of the ranch.”

“True. That could get really messy.”

“I’m so glad I could talk about this with you. It’s been weird to be here without any close friends and not have anyone to talk to.”

“I totally get it. It’s been hard to live here again after graduating from nursing school. I miss that circle I had back in Boulder.” She runs her finger along the condensation on her coaster before her eyes move back up to mine. “I know where we can scout for guys. There’s going to be a rodeo coming through this week. It’s just a small, regional one, but the guys are always down for a good time.”

“That sounds amazing.” I lean forward. “I might need to go shopping though. Or at least have you come over and look through my closet.”

“I can do that.” She pulls out her phone and scrolls through a social media app before showing me the screen. “It’s Friday through Sunday, but Saturday night will be prime time to find someone. We’ll just have to make sure you have condoms because some of those guys could be walking petri dishes.”

I scrunch my nose up. “Maybe I’ll pass.”

“I’ll be your wing woman for the night. We’ll find a decent one for you.”

By the time she drops me off at the ranch, we have a plan for the weekend. I’m so excited I’m practically buzzing as I walk around the back of the house to go grab Charlie from the barn. The sight that greets me has me stopping short in my tracks, though. Luke is playing fetch with her while he stands by the goat pasture, giving the girls some scratches in between tosses.

I hang back to take the sight in. I definitely crossed a line earlier today, and I’m mildly embarrassed to make amends. That question had no right being asked. I blame it on the dreams I’ve been having about him every night. Sometimes I swear when I wake up, aching to my core, I can actually smell him like he’s been in my bedroom.

I thought about asking Janey about him but then thought better of it. She doesn’t need to know I’ve developed a crush on her married brother. But also, where is his wife? I know they live on the property in a cabin pushed back from the main house, but I’ve never seen her in the weeks I’ve been back. It’s very strange.

Charlie sees me and drops the stick in favor of running toward me. I bend down and scoop her up. Guess the time to apologize has arrived. I cross the yard with a sheepish smile on my face.

“Thank you for playing with her,” I say as I come to a stop next to him.

“It’s fine. She needs the exercise.” He reaches down and scratches Dorothy while Rose tries to butt in. The goats are named afterThe Golden Girlsbecause it’s Grandma’s favorite show. “How’s your head?”

“Good, all healed up. Going to have an ugly scar though.”

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