Page 13 of All Signs Point to Malibu

“Wait, let’s see how high they’ll go,” he whispers.

Mrs. Miller shoots him a look and goes to the microphone. “On that note, let’s conclude today’s career week presentation.”

Smart. Cut us off on a high, before it goes sideways again.

“A special thanks to Hailey Harris and Warren Mitchell for their generous contributions,” she says, applauding us. “Early lunch everyone.”

I wave to the crowd as they quickly disperse from the bleachers. “If anyone wants an autograph...” No one’s listening.

Hailey stifles a laugh, but I don’t see anyone clamoring to meet her either. Kids are tougher to impress these days.

In the hallway a moment later, Hailey and I race toward the exit and try to leave at the same time through the same door, our bodies colliding again. She’s actually stronger than she looks. Her five-foot-three frame should have been sailing across the hallway with the body check I just delivered, yet she holds her own as we lodge ourselves in the door frame in our struggle to get through.

This is ridiculous. I know it. Yet something about her turns me into an immature dick. I begrudgingly, generously, stand back and motion for her to go first. I can be the bigger person.

Nose in the air, she pushes through the door.

I slide my sunglasses on, then quickly catch the swinging door she’s released before it hits me in the face. “Always a pleasure,” I say through gritted teeth as we step out into the sunshine.

Hailey simply flips me off as she heads toward her convertible.

THREE

HAILEY’S DAILY RULE FOR SUCCESS:

Even bad press can promote your brand, if you’re creative enough to spin it.

Not the best way to wake up in the morning.

Normally, being tagged in a viral video would have my follower count rising, but the post from Sharksfan2008 of the career week presentations—or lack thereof—has me cringing as I peer at it through sleepy eyes at 4:25 a.m. Not just because Warren and I look unprofessional—debating one another instead of keeping our personal feud to ourselves—but because the comments are heavily in favor of Warren’s point of view.

When did work/life balance become the current social narrative?

And there’s no way this teenager has enough of a following to make this post trend. A quick search confirms my suspicion that it was “shared” by Spencer Stanley on his socials.

If I’m keeping tabs on my competition, the competition is definitely keeping tabs on me.

Time to do damage control.

Which means rolling over and going back to sleep, intentionally skipping my morning motivational post.

A few hours later, a refreshing fruity virgin cocktail in hand, Gucci sunglasses on, I float in my pool on my gold floatie shaped like a dollar sign—a gift from an investor client I saved from jail by advising him against a fraudulent get rich quick scheme. Cell phone in hand, I smile and go live to my followers.

“Hey, Hustlers! This is your midweek reminder to breathe.”

A deep inhale and slow exhale as the floatie continues to drift toward the edge of the pool.

“Even hustlers need downtime. Make sure to take a few moments today and enjoy the rewards of your effort. Why else are you working so hard if you can’t—”

My words are cut off as the floatie hits the edge of the pool. A loud hissing is all I hear before I’m swallowed by the toxic-smelling PVC.

None of today’s nineteen horoscopes predicted this was how I was going to die.

Flailing my legs and arms, I hold my breath and struggle to free myself as the middle of the floatie sinks. Vinyl tries to swallow me whole. I continue to fight it off and finally tip free into the water. I shriek and hold the phone above the surface as my body is submerged. Cold water steals my breath (okay, let’s be real—the pool’s heated, but damn, it’s still a shock). Seconds before my lungs are depleted of air, I resurface and reach for the edge of the pool. I quickly stop the live stream, but not before eight hundred followers have viewed the post. Hearts and laughy face emojis pop up on the feed.

At least they were laughing. Mission accomplished, I guess.

I climb out of the water and grab a towel from the lounge chair, then examine the pool. A large crack is visible in the concrete.

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