Page 103 of Sweet Little Spies

“It means I had something happen to me,” Kala said quietly.“It happened when I was dumb enough to get kidnapped so your brother would walkinto his stalker’s trap. I don’t talk about it so you’re not getting the story,and if you say anything…”

“I wouldn’t. Ever. I would never tell your secrets, cousin,but I worry if you don’t ever talk, they’ll take you down.” She’d been awareKyle had been in trouble once years before. They’d all gone into lockdown, andKala hadn’t been there. But she’d been assured her cousin came through it allfine. “You don’t have to tell me anything. I’m sorry I asked.”

Kala was oddly fragile at times. Now Carys had an idea why,and it broke her heart.

“Don’t be.” Kala seemed to shake it off. She smiled Pierre’sway when he slid the drink in front of her and then Carys. “Merci, mon ami.”

Pierre inclined his head and then moved back down the bar,picking up his cell phone.

“Test it first.” Kala slid a thin test strip into Carys’sdrink. It came back clean. “Every time someone hands you a drink, you test it.Unless you pour it yourself and you opened the bottle, you test.”

Carys nodded. Kala tested her own drink and seemed satisfiedwith the results.

“I will.” They were going into Huisman’s world tomorrow.

Kala slipped the test strips back into her bag and held upher glass. “Za tva-jó zda-ró-vye.”

She knew this one since she’d spent many days with her AuntCharlotte. She clinked glasses with her cousin. “To your health.”

Kala took a long drink and set it back down. “All right. Youwant to know if there’s anything sexual about Tris playing at The Court.Probably.”

Carys took an even longer drink because that wasn’t theanswer she’d been looking for.

“But not the way your jealous mind is thinking,” her cousincontinued. “Tris has had a connection to you and Aidan all of his life. He waspretty much the Dom right from the beginning. In the way most Doms in our livesare Doms. He didn’t make all the decisions, but when it was somethingimportant, he took control. Did he initiate sex the first time?”

“He planned it all out. He made it special,” she admitted.“I think Aidan would have just done it and been happy, but Tris plotted andturned it into something magical. Then he found all the weaknesses in my dad’ssecurity system and started visiting me after hours.”

They’d all been insatiable. It had been damn lucky herparent’s bedroom was on the first floor and opposite hers. She’d had to bribethe hell out of her younger brother and then cover for him when his horny assdiscovered sex.

“Hey, didn’t we all. I used to spend Saturday nights atCoop’s.” She stopped and chuckled. “I would have totally gotten away with ittoo if it hadn’t been for those meddling kidnappers.”

Her cousin used humor to cover her pain. Carys had alwaysknown it, but now she wondered how deep the pain went. “Does Coop know?”

Kala’s head shook. “I stopped talking to that asshole thenight it all went down. We eventually became friends again, but none of thismatters. What does matter is how Tris is wired. A lot of his identity is tiedup in being a Dom. He was raised around the lifestyle. It makes sense to him.”

“But his partners weren’t there.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Kala countered. “Being in the club,even topping subs, made him feel closer to you. Because it made him feel morelike the him he was when he was with you. I can’t be certain this is exactlythe way he feels, but I would bet it’s close. When I put on my fet wear, I tapinto a part of me I like. A part of me that’s not afraid of anything. A part ofme that’s still capable of maybe one day forming a connection with someone. Orrepairing a connection with someone. A part of me that still trusts.”

Her heart ached for her cousin. Would it ache for herself ifshe couldn’t figure this out? “It feels like cheating.”

“But to him it felt like reaching out across space andtouching some part of you.” Kala’s voice went wistful. “When he wasdisciplining a submissive, he was fulfilling the role he always had in yourlife. He was using it as a touchstone. Not something that showed him all thepossibilities he could have, but rather it showed him what he loved. Like amemory. Sometimes those can fuel us when everything else seems lost.”

Tears pierced her eyes. Had Tristan been trying to keep adoor open when she’d thought he’d locked it? The idea made her want to melt andyet… “It doesn’t make it right. He shut me out. He could have had the realthing.”

Kala knocked back the rest of her drink. “He did. Iunderstand that, too. He did some shitty things to get this job done. He saysit was to protect you, but some of it was about protecting him. How would hissainted doctor girlfriend feel when she saw how much blood was on his hands?Carys, it’s probably time for you to call it. You know there’s a point of noreturn in any attempted resuscitation. Not much you can do if the doc workingon the patient shrugs and walks away.” Kala looked down at her watch. “Time ofdeath. 11:10 p.m.”

Tears gone. She was back to anger. Maybe it had been astupid idea to think Kala could take this seriously. “What is that supposed tomean? And don’t tell me I didn’t fight. I’m sick of hearing that. I asked himto come home. He said no.”

“Preach, sister.” Kala slapped at the bar. “He said no.Leave his ass. He’s not worth it. He said no. He’s stubborn. He doesn’t deserveyou and you can totally do better. While you’re at it, Aidan’s a prick, too. Imean he hid shit. You need one-hundred-percent honesty or the relationship isover. Don’t worry about it. Mom will set you up with some accountant dude whowill never, ever put his relationship on hold to try to save the world.” Shechuckled. “Not that Tris did a great job. He kind of sucked at it.”

“You are such a bitch.” Carys stared at her cousin.

Kala seemed to sober and fiddled with her glass, rattlingthe ice around. “So I’ve heard. Look, Car, you’ve come to the wrong person ifyou want me to give you advice. You either love him and can forgive him, or youlove him and you’ll feel his loss for the rest of your fucking life.Personally, I went for door number two, and I spend my nights drinking and Ionly feel like the me I could have been when I’m in the club and he’s at myside. I’m in a box. You want to climb in with me or do you want to realize it’snot worth tossing out years of love and devotion because he faltered? It’s notbad, you know. The box. We have vodka and cookies and the deep sense ofsatisfaction that you never dragged him down with you. I can scoot over and youcan sit here with me. You can let me drag you down instead. Always knew Iwould.”

Her cousin’s words were rumbling inside her, but she shovedaside the way they made her feel—antsy and angry with a big spoonful ofdoubt—because something was wrong. Kala wasn’t sitting up straight anymore.There was a hazy look to her normally predatory stare. “How much have you hadto drink?”

Kala shook her head. “That was my third, but like I saidthere’s not much vodka in it. It’s mostly tonic. Fuck. It’s drugged. Car…run.”

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