Page 93 of Assassin Anonymous

And he snaps his foot out so fast I don’t even see it coming. It lands on the side of my head and sends me spinning to the floor. He circles me and pulls the sweater over his head as I struggle to get my bearings. He’s shirtless underneath, and while he’s not big, he’s carved out of granite. He turns his arms out a little, posing a bit, then rubs his triceps.

“Not bad, right?” he asks. “I have more money than you can imagine. And time. With all that money and time I’ve trained my mind and body. More fighting styles than I can list. Targeted weight training. Hell, I constructed a mock Hell Week to complete, which I did, in record time. You were a SEAL, you remember what that was like.”

I get to my feet and he throws another kick at my head, so fast I can’t get out of the way.

“The thing is, I’m not like you,” Stuart says. “I’m not lying to myself.”

Kozlov wraps his hands around Astrid’s throat, and I forget about Stuart for a second and launch myself, slamming into the both of them, knocking them to the ground. I’m about to help Astrid out of the chair, when Stuart grabs me from behind and sends me sailing. I hit the window and bounce off. Mercifully, it doesn’t break, but it’s hard enough that stars bloom in my vision.

I clamber into something like a fighting stance as the knife wound on my side screams at me. I can feel warmth spreading across my skin. Must have ripped the stitches again.

Stuart spreads his hands out, palms up. “C’mon, Mark. You were born for this life. All I had to do was apply a little bit of pressure and what happened? Okay, you didn’t kill anyone. Congratulations. You did everything but. You fell right back onto the power of your name. You used fear as a weapon. You want to have it both ways. Be the Pale Horse and Mark. You’re one or the other, my man, and I think you know which one it is.”

Of all the blows I’ve taken in the last few days—and some of them have been pretty serious—that’s the one that lands hardest. That’s the one that makes me forget my box breathing and the serenity prayer and just about every other thing I’ve achieved.

Because he’s right.

I didn’t just fall back into my old patterns.

I did a shit job of convincing myself I wasn’t enjoying it.

But I was.

I loved every second of tapping into that god-energy again.

My existential funk dissipates when I realize Kozlov is advancing on Astrid, but she’s managed to wriggle free of the chair. She throws a hard kick into Kozlov’s shin, which causes him to throw his head back and howl. She stumbles out of the room, heading deeper into the extravagant apartment. Kozlov goes after her. I turn my full attention to Stuart and wait for him to come at me, but he doesn’t. He stands and waits.

Smart.

Making me come to him.

I don’t indulge. I circle a little, trying to get the pathways of my brain firing again, get my muscles warm.

Pet the bunny closest to the bench.

“Why’d you take the notebook?” I ask.

“Oh, that,” he says. “I mean, if I’m going to dismantle the Agency, I need more data on them. But I also needed a little more data on you. Pressure points, you know? I didn’t really think you would accept my job offer right off the bat.”

“I mean, not ever, probably, you psycho.”

He winces a little, the word leaving a mark on his skin. “Like I said, pressure points.” He takes a phone out of his pocket and waves it at me. “I’ve got two men stationed outside that house in Jericho. They’re watching Sara and Bennett right now. All I have to do is say the word and there won’t be anything left of them but wet smears.”

“And if I take your job you’ll let them live?”

He pauses, not expecting my laid-back reaction.

But the bluster comes charging right back.

“I know this isn’t the best incentive, but hey”—he shrugs—“if it works, it works.”

“I guess there’s only one thing for me to do,” I tell him.

Stuart smiles. “And what’s that?”

“Tell you to take your job offer, turn it sideways, and shove it up your ass.”

He frowns. “You think I’m kidding.” There’s a crashing sound from deeper in the apartment, which draws his attention for a moment. Then he turns back to me and says, “Well, okay.” He dials a number and sets it to speakerphone. When the call picks up, he says, “You can move on the woman and the boy. Keep the phone on so we can listen to what happens.”

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