The psychologist showed no outward reaction. He did not chastise her for her outburst or overly dwell on it when she showed no desire to discuss the matter.
He’s right, isn’t he? Ember thought. Jenna had been forced to enter the burning building to come rescue her. Leilani had done the same that day they rescued the cat. Ultimately, her actions ended up endangering others.
Guess I failed firefighting too
“I can see you spiraling,” the doctor observed.
Ember shrugged, “What would you have me do?”
“For starters?” Some real emotion crept into his voice for the first time since she’d begun the appointment. “Stop putting yourself at risk, that remains the nexus of the problem we’re having, Ember.”
Ember didn’t have any response to that. It was easier said than done.
“Treat yourself like somebody you care about, like somebody you want to see succeed. Put yourself in the shoes of those who care about you enough to risk their lives to run into a burning building to save you.”
On the ride back home, she turned his words over in her head. If she was her mother, what would she want for herself? What would Haley and Rory want for her? If she was Ember’s good friend who wanted to see her succeed, what would she want her to do? What she truly wanted was Josephine to come back. But that wasn’t going to be possible. She’d said her goodbyes.
“Get to work on a new car,” she said out loud. It was meant to be something of a joke, but the idea didn’t leave her mind. She found herself being deposited by the Uber at Farcy’s property. He lived out of town. His next-door neighbor was at least a mile and a half away. Ember couldn’t tell if the man was solitary or just lonely out here.
He was waiting for her outside, dressed in jean overalls with a cigarette stuck between his lips. His ford F150 was sitting in the front of the house.
“Figured you’d show up one of these days. Come on, she’s out in the barn.”
Ember followed after him. They walked around his house. The property looked well-maintained, clearly the old man put some effort into keeping it clean, but she couldn’t help but muse about the feeling that the house didn’t feel like somebody lived in it. She wanted to ask about his family, his wife had passed away, but they had three children, all of whom had moved out at this point.
The American Buick was sitting in the garage, thankfully, still on its wheels. It didn’t look like the man had touched it since the day it caught fire.
“Was thinking you’d bring a mechanic with ya to check it out or something,” he said as she walked around the car.
“Nah, I’m good,” she replied.
Like he said, most of the engine was unsalvageable, the engine block was completely warped and misaligned from the fire. She would need to rebuild the engine bay, she didn’t trust it’s integrity, not after the fire.
“Yeah, you’ve always been a little gearhead,” he commented. “I remember the first day your mom brought you to the drag strip. Had eyes as wide as saucers staring at all the muscle cars around ya.”
He glanced at her. “It’s a shame to see some of that light dimmed since you lost your Joan.”
Again, Ember didn’t know what to say. She and the old man barely spoke even though they met on the drag strip often. It was odd to know the man had such memories of her. How many other people like Farcy were out there?
“How much do you want for it?” Ember thought the car was in relatively good condition. She’d start saving some money for it.
“How much you got?”
Ember did some quick mental calculation. She had some money saved up. But it was not going to be anywhere near enough to pay for the car.
“Only about four thousand. If you give me a little more time, I can?—”
“Take it. Car is worth eight thousand, but you can pay me the remaining half when you’re ready.”
“I—thank you,” Ember said gratefully. Eight thousand dollars was more than fair for the car. It was a classic car, with a lot of history.
“I can send you the money right now,” Ember offered.
The transaction was quick, she accessed her bank account on her phone and sent him the money. Farcy brought a trailer hitch from under a shed and they rolled the car over it. He then hooked it up to his Ford truck and they drove it down to the Ember’s place and rolled the car into her garage.
After all the hard work, Ember and Farcy stepped back to stare at the garage. Seeing a car sitting in there was nice again. All of her tools were still there, some parts left from Joan’s build.
“Well,” Farcy patted her shoulder. “Good luck with it.”