Page 39 of Embers of Love

Becky suddenly turned to her. “I’m starting to realize that maybe I was wrong about you two da?—”

“No, you were right. I’ve thought about it too. The differences in age and experiences are too big,” Josephine said. “And you helped me realize that. I’m sorry that dating your daughter had essentially ruined what could have been a great friendship for us.”

Becky looked sad, but Josephine strengthened her resolve. It was for the best, or so she kept telling herself. Deep down, Josephine was terrified. She could not live through the trauma of losing Ember again. The connection they’d shared in a very short period of time had been greater than anything she had ever felt before. She didn’t have it within herself to heal from further trauma. It was cowardly, but cowardice was an easier pill to swallow than pain.

“I’m sorry,” Becky apologized again. “I wish I could go back and change everything. I didn’t know my actions would hurt you both like this.”

“I know.”

Becky turned to her once more. “Are you sure you can’t help?”

“I think anything I do right now will only cause more damage. Ember will be okay without me. Maybe even better. She’ll find somebody her own age, they’ll fall in love, and I’ll be nothing but a distant memory.”

Becky turned to stare at the ocean. “I thought that, but it really isn’t going that way.”

They sat in companionable silence until it got dark. On her way home, Josephine felt some of the weight lift off her shoulders. At least she’d patched things up with her friend somewhat. They might never be as close as they used to be but there was some closure.

She’d decided that she was going to leave Phoenix Ridge.

Seeing Ember in pain and hearing about her actions was breaking her heart.

9

EMBER

“What the hell was that stunt you pulled last night?!”

Ember had been called into Deputy Chief Sophia Ramirez’s office the moment she resumed back at work. Sophia Ramirez was around Josephine’s age but with a fiery Latina temper. Unlike with her own mother, Sophia did not hesitate to chew her out.

“I was doing my jo?—”

“Oh, spare me that. You’re not a rookie, Thompson.” Sophia jabbed a finger at her to emphasize her point. “If you’re still making rookie mistakes at this stage, then maybe firefighting isn’t the best profession for you. The job is already dangerous enough as it is.”

Ember felt a jolt of panic rising within her, along with the need to defend herself. “I thought there was somebody in the building, Ma’am.”

“And you should have waited, assessed the situation before charging in like some raging bull. That is not what firefighters do!”

Her tirade went on for a good deal longer before she was dismissed. She’d seen the deputy chief get pissed a number of times, but Ember didn’t recall ever seeing her that angry before.

Even the looks she got from the other firefighters were odd. Most were cautious, even when she sat to eat with them. Nobody broached the subject, something she was thankful for, but that only drove home the fact that everyone was consciously avoiding the topic. Eventually, her mom came down hard with an order to see a psychologist for counseling and not return to work until she was deemed fit to serve again.

That was it. She was back home again. Ember had no one to blame this time. It was her own reckless behavior that got her to that point.

Failure. Failure. Failure.

The voice chanted in her mind each time she was alone with her thoughts.

“Your symptoms indicate that you might be suffering from depression, Ember,” the psychologist said.

Ember had been entirely focused on his large-rimmed glasses and the way he pushed them up his nose each time she said something he found to be interesting. Her mind ground to a halt when she processed what he’d said.

“Me? Depressed? I don’t see how I could possibly be… I mean, I’m not locking myself away at home, hiding away from the world.”

He studied her for a moment then nodded his head as though her words had confirmed something he already knew.

“Depression manifests in different ways in different people. Your attempts to end your own life are alarming, to say the least, considering your choice of profession. It is good you were ordered to take this test. You are a danger to yourself and the people who work with you, Ember.”

“I save lives! I wasn’t trying to end my life!” she snapped at him. The sudden wrath had surprised her. Ember prided herself in being coolheaded but something about his words rubbed her wrong.

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