Page 32 of The Shadow of Polaris

Rune slid the back of my tunic over my head, letting it fall beside us, exposing the bareness of my skin. He followed the raised rows of scars across my back with his fingers, as if his touch alone could heal the damage those ridges of flesh caused. Pulling away to catch his breath, he soaked in the moonlight, reflecting off my skin in beams of silver. Following the arch of my neck, down across my breast, to the curve of my hips, his eyes now ignited with golden flecks of desire.

“You’re not a monster,” he whispered, sliding his hand down my waist.

I wasn’t sure if it was his touch that raised goosebumps across my arms or the chill of the night. His hand stopped just above my knee, digging his fingers into the muscle of my thigh. He pulled me closer, wrapping my leg around his torso.

My skin, electrified and aware of every point of contact between us. His lips found mine again, their warmth melting down my throat with each frenzied kiss. Everything within me was alive with his scent, with the feel of his calloused hands against my waist, moving my hips against his.

I could sense I was slipping away. The power between us consumed me entirely, and a deep, frantic need blossomed in my chest. It’d been so long since I’d exposed this part of myself to another. My intimate self, my most feminine, most divine self. It all washed through me as if my skin glowed brilliantly and beautifully with magic.

This yearning that coursed through my veins wasn’t a desire for the man that lay beneath me. Not really. It was a desire for myself. My old self. A suffocating need for her to emerge from that self-confined prison and step into the moonlight. To join me once again in this life. To bring her pallet of colors and paint each back into the world around me.

I clung to Rune, almost savagely, as I willed her to show herself. When our bodies finally molded together, flesh against flesh, she surfaced, bringing with her an upwelling of joy that sent me spiraling and spiraling into sheer, encompassing bliss.

We laid next to one another for a while in silence, as he traced the outline of my collarbone with his fingertip. The pale, bleached moonlight illuminated our bodies as we watched the stars above. Millions of glinting orbs dusted across the sky in hues of blue and violet.

“Did you do it?” Rune turned to face me, silver constellations reflected in his eyes.

I sucked in a breath, curling fistfuls of gravels in my fists.

“Did you kill your sister?” Those deep voids and rotten teeth flashed through my mind.

You did this.

Look what you did.

I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing her decrepit voice out of my head. Rune stroked my cheek, his thumb smoothing away a strand of hair.

“No. I didn’t. She fell ill unexpectedly, and the Elders blamed me. No one believes that, though, and they have punished me for it my entire adult life.” Fiddling with a pebble between my fingers, I turned back to the stars, seeking their comforting light across my face.

Midnight birds cooed at one another as they flittered above us- sporadic little shadows against the infinite chasm overhead.

“I believe you, Elpis,” he whispered.

My chest tightened. Not a single person had ever said those words to me, not even Vikar. Deep down, I think even he suspected me. Hearing those sounds and syllables strung together, I couldn’t help but cry.

“You don’t know how much that means to me,” I said between hushed sobs.

Rune squeezed my hand and I relaxed my fist, letting the gravel scatter back across the ground. He pulled me into his chest, letting me cry.

I sobbed until all the pain and hurt and anguish of my past was stained across his tunic in damp patches of tears. Brushing away the hair stuck to my wet cheeks, he placed a gentle kiss across my brow and squeezed me tighter. I wanted to stay wrapped in his heat forever, safe from my uncertain future and my unforgiving past. I’m not sure when I dozed off, but what felt like only minutes later, ringlets of dawn coiled across our faces.

Chapter 19

At dawn, Rune and I packed and continued our journey east. Arcturas, having slept soundly through the night, now zoomed up and down the road as we trudged on, every once in a while returning with a stick for Rune to toss.

“She’s so happy out here.” Rune smiled, watching my wolf sprint back and forth across the trail.

“She’d been cooped up in the tavern for far too long. She can finally stretch her legs and feel the fresh breeze on her face,” I said, feeling tendrils of cool, morning air lick across my cheeks.

“Being out here suits you, too.” He gazed at me with those sparkling, cherry wood eyes.

I found myself lost in those eyes, swimming in them, warm and cool at the same time. Dreaming, but awake. Images of last night rushed through me, pooling in my stomach. My cheeks burned as I remembered the feel of his hands against my skin.

“I feel more myself when I’m not confined in one place,” I said, clearing my throat.

“You and I are similar in that way,” Rune said, trailing off as he drifted away, into his thoughts. I wondered where his day dreams took him, what shadows lurked in his mind, what light banished them away. His brow softened with a hint of sadness as we carried on down the road.

With each passing mile, the landscape became more overgrown, more unkempt. Underbrush crept into the roadway, thickening into dense patches of thistles.

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