Page 82 of Broken Bonds

I look at the ring on my left finger that I thought meant a promise. It doesn’t matter anymore. I take it off and leave it there, carelessly. It doesn’t matter what happens to it. I have lost more valuable things.

Now I’m wanted by many, but one thing is for sure, none of them want me, the way I long for.

The paper is wet with my tears, the ink has run in some places, I’ve had to cross it out several times and start again. This is like a map of my life, in case the police come looking for me, I will know exactly how to defend myself.

Here in Carrollton, everyone knows me, they know who I am, what I’ve done all my life. No one knew about Lionel until that man appeared a few months ago. He was so smart, making sure everyone I knew was aware we were together and in love. Our relationship was quite public, as well as the touches I considered romantic at the time.

Stupid girl, stupid, stupid girl.

It was so easy for him to come here, and find a silly little small-town girl and make her part of his plan.

Afterward, what was his plan? When I was a millionaire widow, was he going to finish me off too?

And what was all that about wanting to get me pregnant?

Was he going to kill our child too?

My head is spinning, as is my stomach. I run to the bathroom and barely manage to get there.

I stay there on the floor, with my head resting on the wall behind me, with no strength to move.

Damn, I should have brought the wine with me. I could use another drink. Through the small window I see as the sun begins to rise and cast its rays—time continues its course.

The world doesn’t stop, everything continues, moving forward. I’m not sure if I’m dreaming or if it’s actually happening. Boots I’ve seen many times before enter my line of sight and I hear his voice.

He found me. My heart speeds up, or stops. I’m not even sure. Fear invades me, and my breath gets caught in my throat. I should’ve thought about it more before I came back. Maybe the ticket to Miami would have been a better way out. A true escape.

“Here you are,” he says like it isn’t evident.

I don’t dare say his name, because I don’t know who he actually is. I shake my head from side to side, trying to clear my mind.

“What are you doing here?” I ask him with a dry mouth. “Why did you come?”

I hear him laugh softly before speaking. “I’m the one asking the questions here,” he says hoarsely. Yes, they are so similar and at the same time so different. Now I can see it, the blinders have fallen from my eyes. They have robbed me of the trust, the hope, the desire to believe in someone. My faith in love. “But I will be good to you, this time. I came to remind you who you belong to.”

His strong arms lift me off the ground, I want to kick his nuts and defend myself. I want to scream until my throat hurts that he has already done enough damage.

But my body doesn’t respond. My legs seem to be made of a trembling mass that refuses to act and I hate it. I put myself in danger when I came here, when I got drunk. Not thinking about my safety.

I’m so predictable.

I hardly notice when he pulls the dirty shirt up, pulling it over my head. With half-open and heavy eyes, I look into his, they are the same color yet they see me differently. There is no love in his gaze. Just an emotion I can’t name and that fills me with fear.

Pure fear.

“Please,” I plead as he drops me onto the bed we have shared many nights together. “I don’t know who you are or what you want from me, but it won’t work. They know everything.”

“Shut up. You were mine first, Stella. I was the one who chose you. He’s not going to steal you from me too,” he yells at me before slapping me, I have no idea what he’s talking about.

Lionel stole something from him. What did he steal?

“I don’t want to hear another word.”

My world goes black, I don’t know whether that is a curse or a blessing.

I don’t know what he’s going to do with me.

By the time I open my eyes again the house is silent and dark, only the lights from the streetlamps softly illuminate the room. My head is about to explode and my body feels heavy.

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