Page 80 of Cloud Storm

“That’s my brave girl,” he murmurs.

“Am I really your girl?” I ask, sitting up a little, wanting to watch his beautiful eyes as he answers me.

“You’re more than that,” he replies, taking me by the shoulders, fitting my body over his.

He reacts to my contact, straightening, hardening. And I, well, I’m weaker than I’ve ever been. What good would denying it do?

“Lancelot, you must sleep, you’re still recovering.” He’s not superman, even if he thinks he is.

“I’m a big boy, I can take care of myself.” Yes, indeed he is a big boy.

“I can give faith to the truth in that regard.”

“Later,” he promises. “Now go on.”

I talk about the difficulties I had getting a job without a single document. Come on, I wasn’t even sure of the exact place of my birth, so how could I place The Villa on the map?

“It’s so easy to take those things for granted. You make me feel like a spoiled son of a bitch,” he says, covering his face with his arm.

“You’re not spoiled, Lancelot,” I murmur, moving his arm away. “You were just normal and I was just different.”

“No, Ariel, you weren’t different,” he replies. “You were unique and you still are.”

If I still had any doubts in my head, now I’m sure. There is no choice. I’m totally in love with Lancelot Hills.

Head over heels in love with him.

And scared to death.

You know what? This time I’m going to take a chance. Lancelot is worth it, we are worth it. Fear can go to hell, I’m tired of running scared.

“How did you end up in San Diego?” he asks after a comfortable silence.

“Well, I’m not done yet,” I say, continuing. “After many difficulties, I eventually managed to get a menial job, which allowed me to find a place to live. It was very basic and pretty disgusting until I cleaned it up, but at least it was mine, just as long as I paid the rent. That first job was in a small laundromat, after that I worked in a bowling alley until it caught fire, and it got closed down. By the time I was twenty-one, I was working as a waitress in a road bar. The tips were good, the atmosphere not so much.”

“Is that why you decided on a change of air?”

I put my head on his shoulder, afraid to keep talking. He’s about to discover my biggest secret. My biggest shame.

It’s one thing to bare your soul to someone who does not know you, who does not see you, another to do it to someone who is important to you.

Because even if I don’t want to admit it out loud, Lancelot is very important to me. So much so, that he’s quickly becoming the center of my world.

“I earned good money in that bar, but I also discovered alcohol, along with other things. I was naive, I didn’t understand the dangers of the world. I was stupid, an easy target.”

“I don’t think you’ve ever been stupid, you just lacked experience, which is a whole different thing. What happened?” he persists. Clearly he has no intention of dropping the subject, so the time has come to spill the beans.

“There was this girl in the bar, she called herself LeXXXie. Yeah, with triple X, you can imagine what that meant.” He nods and I continue. “She used to party with some clients from the bar after work, and they offered us money to go with them. There was a lot of playing around, alcohol made everything seem cool. It was fun to forget your worries for a while, to just be young and let go.”

“One night, completely drunk, I confessed to LeXXXie that I’d never slept with anyone. At first she was horrified, but then she decided to make it her mission to get someone to pay to take my virginity.”

“Ariel, no!” Lancelot exclaims in shock. “Please tell me you didn’t sell yourself to the highest bidder.”

“Yes, Lancelot, that’s exactly what I did,” I admit, trembling. “Although in my defense, I didn’t understand that LeXXXie was effectively prostituting me, that she’d become my pimp without me even realizing it.”

I take a breath, trying to work out what to say to explain my past behavior. It points to me, accuses me, now it remains only to make my final statement.

“At least the guy was kind. It wasn’t a great experience, but he wasn’t rough and when he asked to see me again, I even thought he might want something serious with me,” I laugh bitterly. “Then, on our third date I learned that he was married with two kids. That night, my supposed friend and I had a huge row. She claimed she’d only been doing it for my benefit, to get money for me to move to a better place, but when I refused to carry on with her disgusting game, she flew into a rage and threatened to call her boss. She was not the only one involved, so I did what I had to do, I packed a couple of things and with the money I had saved from the restaurant, I bought the bus ticket that brought me to California so I could start from scratch again. Plus, I hate cold weather, and this is the sunshine state, right?”

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