Page 59 of Rainstorm

If my girl wanted to see me surfing on my board, then that’s what she would see.

“Okay, but you have to promise I’ll get my reward when we return.” I winked.

The truth was, I’d do anything for this woman, reward or not.

By the time she was sitting on a lounger on the beach, book in hand, wearing a big straw hat over her head and her gaze fixed on me, despite the distance separating us, I had never felt so attached to another person before.

Her gaze fixed on mine as I floated on my element, distracted from surfing as I looked back at her, and it dawned on me that even though I didn’t know it, I’d actually been searching for this woman my whole life.

And I’d found her.

Chapter 13

Rose

Present day

How do you begin to rebuild your life when you feel like nothing more than a disjointed reflection in a shattered mirror?

I still have no idea what the answer is despite asking myself the same question over and over since I woke up a few hours ago.

“Did you sleep well?” Ariel asks, snapping me out of my thoughts. She’s wrapped in her unicorn robe, has a bow in her hair that only she can pull off, plus she’s sucking on one of those strawberry lollipops that she seems addicted to.

“Eating candy already?” I raise my eyebrows at her.

“Are you gonna see Sawyer today?” As ever, she avoids my question by asking another. This girl is like a magician, always hiding her secrets.

“Yep. Best get it over and done with.”

“Rosie, I understand breakups are never easy, and I’d come with you if I thought it would help,” she says, sitting beside me on the old sofa that serves as my bed. “But there are decisions only you can make for yourself, so it’s best that you speak with him on your own.”

Her insight surprises me, and one day I’m going to find out how she got to be so wise, but not right now, not when I barely have the strength to keep going.

This is the hardest thing I have ever done, but as alcoholics say, one day at a time.

I have at least managed to dress appropriately and comb my hair, so that’s something. Despite the car key stashed in my purse, I’ve decided to walk to the lawyer’s office. I need time to focus my thoughts, and the short walk offers the perfect time to do it.

I’m really nervous about this meeting, more than I want to admit and not because I’m seeing the lawyer but because of what it represents. Today I will officially begin the divorce process and the few ties that still bind me to Chase will start to unravel, a process that began the second he handed me the blue folder which I now hold in my hands.

The lawyer wants to review the terms of the agreement, so I’m taking it with me.

You can do this, Rose! I force myself to repeat this mantra in my head.

There’s no turning back so I have to move on. I could say that I’m heartbroken but actually I don’t have a heart now, not since it decided to stay with my husband when I left our marital home.

Leaving Ariel’s house was the easy part, but now every step feels as if I’m walking to my execution. My green mile is excessively long.

I just can’t accept the idea of a divorce.

Why is this happening when it wasn’t what I wanted?

Chase presented it as a fait accompli, but shouldn’t I have had some say in the matter?

It’s my life too, after all.

Chase made the decision for both of us. How fucking dare he?

My anger makes me accelerate as I walk. With the office just a few blocks from Ariel’s apartment, I find myself arriving early in front of the building in East Village for my ten o’clock appointment.

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