Page 120 of Rainstorm

“Chase, please explain what’s going on? What is all this?”

All my things are here. Everything. It’s as if Chase has waved a magic wand to reinstate our home, putting it all back together again after we dismantled it.

“Welcome home, my love,” he whispers.

“But we sold the house. This is crazy, Holland.” I’m trembling so much I can hardly stand up. Maybe I need to borrow his cane…

“Rose, I bought you out of this house, so you could have the money you needed for your bakery business, which I know is very important to you. So I still own the house, and I’m really hoping that now we’ve both had time to think things through, you’ll agree to give our marriage another go and move back in with me, but if you’d rather we moved somewhere else, that’s also fine. All I want is a chance to make up for the terrible mistakes I made. I know I acted like a stupid fucking idiot, but I’ve never stopped loving you and I’m begging you to give me another chance.”

His emotional plea can’t hide his excitement at the prospect of us getting back together, but I’m very confused. All I know for sure is… that I don’t know a thing.

Chase tugs on my hand to show me what’s here in the house.

“How? How on earth have you done all this? You’ve been laid up in the hospital, and all my stuff was in a storage.” I’m flabbergasted and confused.

“My mother and Ariel may have helped me out, just a teensy bit.” He grins, holding up his finger and thumb to indicate the tiny amount.

I try to scowl at potentially having my hand forced this way, but I can’t really bring myself to be angry with him, because the truth is I’m really, really happy. Maybe I should be angry that he’s making assumptions, but I don’t have it in me, not after very nearly losing him. The second I saw him here I knew we were meant to get back together.

“That girl and I are going to have a long talk when I get home,” I gripe.

“I’m really hoping you won’t be going back to live with Ariel. Because this is your home, Rose, if you want it to be, and I really hope you do. This is where you belong.” My mouth gapes as he smiles at me again. He’s such a scoundrel but there’s no denying I do still love him, so very much.

He holds his arms opens for me, and I know he didn’t mean just the house. He means that I belong in his arms, in his heart.

And it’s the only place I want to be. Forever.

“But Chase we’re…” I falter because it hurts to say it out loud.

“Divorced?” He takes my hand and leads me to the dining room table, where I see that blue folder containing those hideous letters which changed my life, perhaps forever.

“Rose, I want us to be together again. Since the day I gave you those stupid fucking documents everything turned to dust. Now I can see that all I did was hurt you and I was wrong, so very, very wrong, but in my defense, I was also desperate, and I thought it was the only way out.” He takes a deep breath, closes his eyes and looks at me again before continuing.

“I’ve respected your wishes and given you the space you asked for in your letter, space to sort out your feelings. But I know that a love like ours is forever, even if I didn’t seem to act that way for a while. Now I’m hoping that you’re ready for me to kneel in front of you and ask if you’ll consent to be my wife again.”

I hold my breath as he slowly kneels.

“I don’t want to make any promises I can’t keep, Rose, because life is uncertain. What I can promise you is that I’m here to give you all of me, all of my soul and all of my heart. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Please don’t let our love slip away again. I want you to choose me, to choose us, but the final choice is yours, Roselynn Banks.”

“No,” I whisper. “I’m Mrs. Roselynn Holland. My last name is Holland, and it always will be.”

Chase produces the ring he has concealed in his hand, then slowly and carefully puts it back where it belongs.

Can I say that I’m more excited to see it there now than the first time he did it? Well, I’m going to anyway.

He kisses my knuckles tenderly, but right now that’s just not enough.

I want more.

I need more.

I want it all.

I won’t settle for less.

This is our life, the decisions we make, the circumstances we face. An ocean of waves to be sailed, ephemeral, unpredictable, beautiful and terrifying, all at the same time. Like reaching out for a shooting star, I’m going to reach out and grab the love of this wonderful man instead of watching him from afar.

I never surrendered to the storm, instead we rode it out and now the storm and I have become one.

---