Page 32 of Beyond The Stars

After practice, Qamar jogged over to them, his face glistening with sweat but his smile as bright as ever. “Thanks for coming,” he said, looking directly at Siasia. “It means a lot.”

Siasia nodded, her heart softening. “Yeah, well, Noodle really wanted to see you play.”

Qamar chuckled and ruffled Noodle’s hair. “I’m glad she did. And I’m glad you did too.” He reached out for Esmeray, surprised when she turned her head still in Noodle’s arms. “Damn, you turning on me for Noodle?”

“Turned on me too.” Malaysia fake mushed her daughter’s face.

As they walked back to the cars, Siasia couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief. Maybe this was the start of something new, something better. As the sun set behind them, casting a golden glow over the field, she allowed herself to believe anything was possible.

Qamar bumped Siasia’s shoulder. “You feel better now that you understand?”

They were sitting on a bench while Malaysia played with the girls on the playground. It was getting dark but the park’s lights were bright enough for them to still have the time of their lives. The park was empty with the exception of them. That made it that much more special.

“Why didn’t you just tell me that yesterday?” She faced him.

“Would you have believed me?”

“Probably not.” Siasia laughed, knowing she wasn’t trying to hear nothing he said last night.

“Why?”

“You are an anomaly. On paper we don’t even make sense,” she revealed, exposing her insecurities.

“Fuck paper.”

Siasia agreed. “Yea, fuck paper.”

“We can write our story in the stars. In the stars we’ll make sense.” Qamar wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him.

“How you know? We just met a month ago.” She anchored her attention on him, looking in his eyes like he had all the answers.

“I can feel it. You bring me comfort. With you, I feel like I can just be. Ain’t no pressure when I’m with you.”

“So, you think I’m easy? I don’t require much?” Siasia’s brows created an upside-down triangle in the middle of her forehead.

Lazily, his hand fleshed against his face. “Man, you just gotta be difficult… make shit sound worse than what it is.”

“When you’ve been hurt and let down like I’ve been hurt and let down, it’s all you know.” She tried to smile to hide the pain in her eyes.

Reality was a bitch like that. You walked around all day feeling down, unloved, used, and depressed but when it was time to actually express it, you’d either shut down or use a smile or joke to mask how ugly your day really was.

“Don’t collect hurts. Don’t keep up with shit that keeps your heart from smiling. Let any and everything go that causes you pain… even if it’s me one day,” Qamar spoke with knowledge maybe even a little foreshadow.

Whatever it was, it didn’t cause Siasia any worry. “I doubt that. You’re easy to love.”

“Love?” He smirked, looking out at the girls. “This shit feels perfect.”

“But what happens when on some days it doesn’t feel so perfect? Or when you really get to know all the dark shit I try so hard to keep from you?”

“Looking forward to hurt again? Didn’t I just check that shit, mama?” Qamar eyed her. “We just talked about this.”

“Nigga, whatever.” Siasia looked up at him in annoyance before pulling her camera out. Placing it to her eye, she snapped a few candid shots of Malaysia and the girls on the swings. “Go over there so I can some with you in it.”

He wanted to ask about the deep dark shit she was trying so hard to hide but decided against it. “They better be good,” Qamar jested, standing to his feet.

Dressed in joggers and a plain white shirt, he swaggered over to the swings. With each step he took, Siasia snapped his image from the back with the girls in his foreground. She followed behind him, getting closer capturing the smiles and laughs of Noodle and Esmeray who seemed like twin flames. If she could pause life right there, she’d relive the night over and over because for the first time ever, Siasia felt peace.

“Come on, Qamar, lets race like we used too,” Malaysia suggested.

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