Page 10 of Four Times Forever

She jumped and turned to look at me, waking up the hairs on my skin. My mother looked from me to Matt and down at our joined hands with a scowl, cementing my decision.

"You're right. I think it's best if you leave. I'll pack your stuff for you." I hardened my voice and dug my heel into the ground.

For a second, her pupils narrowed and her eyes went wide.

"And you're staying?" she asked.

"Of course. This is my home." I squeezed Matt's hand and he pulled me closer, wrapping his arm around my waist, giving me the courage I needed.

My mother's lip curled. "You're choosing them?!"

"I'm choosing happiness," I nodded.

She scoffed. "Just you wait and see. One day all of this is going to crumble around you and you'll be crawling back home."

The fire-breathing dragon I inherited from her awakened within me and I got heartburn trying to push against it. As I wrestled with the monster, Matt brought me back with a squeeze on my hip.

"That will never happen," he asserted. Respectful. Hot.

Could we sidestep all this shit and go fuck already?

"I'll never step foot in that house again." I breathed a lungful of air. "I wish you the best, Mom."

With that, I headed to her room. Together, Matt and I packed up her stuff. The sooner she left, the sooner I could focus on doing what I loved...who I loved...while I figured out who the hell I was without my mother.

Chapter 7

Matt

Oh, thank fuck. Whoo, shit. Little legs of relief skittered up and down my spine. Getting Lily to kick her mother out wasn't my intention, but I couldn't say it didn't feel good as hell.

That woman's eyes. I think I preferred it when they were lifeless. As terrifying as she was to look at, it was nothing compared to the terror of her looking into my eyes and seeing deep within my soul. There was no way she knew what happened, yet... how else could I explain it, other than, she KNEW.

I swear my heart thudded when she turned her accusation on us. I don't know how I managed to keep it together in front of Lily. I'm not sure how much longer I can bear to be in her presence before the truth begins to seep through the cracks and Lily's able to see it as well.

Glad Ethan and Eric showed up to help Lily finish the packing and withstand some of the heat, themselves, I removed myself. I had to get as far away as possible. Through the woods of this islet wasn't far enough. It was quiet though, except for a few birds. And the enormous trees, so close together, secluded me, as if they'd agreed to keep my terrible secrets. It's funny that I was finding solace in a place so similar to the murder scene. I'll admit I didn't think about that when I started to walk. I needed to put some distance between me, the main house, the damned guest house, Lily, Mrs. Thornbread, the truth on the tip of my tongue, and the guilt that prompted me to spill it.

I'd stepped through our gate that brought Lily so much joy when she first saw it, with all our initials on it, and I fought the urge to rip the giant metal weight off its hinges. That's what Lily will do when she finds out we're lying to her. She might not burn this house down, but the home I've found in her will be reduced to rubble.

I rubbed my chest, where my anchor tattoo sat. It was supposed to bring me peace, balance out all the shit that stormed through me. It had brought me a lot of that stability in the past, when I started backpacking and never looked back. No matter where I was in the world or how much trouble I was in, I'd grip my anchor necklace and later, tattoo, to remind myself that there's no storm too big and scary for me to handle. I feared this one was.

Maybe that's why being in the forest was bringing me some level of peace this time around. We both shared secrets and there was some kinship within the roots and limbs.

My phone rang and I looked at the screen. It was Lily. I couldn't be her support right now. I couldn't look her in the eyes and let her lean on me, knowing what I knew. I couldn't call her mother delusional and crazy without heartburn tearing up the inside of my chest. Hell, I couldn't even be there for Ryan. I didn't know where the hell he was.

Right now, I needed someone to be there for me. And I so badly wished this was something I could pull out my camera to vlog about. Ha! Land my ass straight into the prison cell where I deserved to be. Where those two men should be, facing the consequences of their crimes. I had money. I could've paid the best lawyers to make sure that they never walked free again. I fucked up.

In the embrace of the forest, I let my tears run free, knowing the woodlands wouldn't judge me. They'd participated in worse. Unfortunately, I was in good company.

Lily

I could use the support of all my men as my mother got ready to walk out of my life and turn her back on me in stubborn support of the man who never loved me, never loved her, and almost got me killed. But I couldn't blame Matt for needing space and hell knew where Ryan was.

Eric shouldered one of her bags and Ethan grabbed two suitcases and followed the nurse who was also carrying bags, out the door.

"Hold on. Where are you going with my stuff?" my mother shouted from her wheelchair.

She'd worn herself out from all her unnecessary accusations and drama. It was safer for her to be wheeled out to the car and surprisingly, she agreed which must have meant she wasn't feeling so great. Considering that she had refused to eat anything, it made sense. She was strong enough to slap food away from her mouth now, that was for damn sure.

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