Page 69 of Rock Strong

“I’m allowed to have one meh performance, Robbie. I’m not a fucking robot. But I’ll get back on track. Sheesh.” I shook my head, tossing the paper into the trash.

“Good man.” He slapped my back and offered me some orange juice.

Suddenly, I was accosted in a group hug. It was Corbin and Tucker, smelling like shit. “Dudes, you guys need to shower before you show up to these things,” I said smugly.

“Yes, Mom.” Tucker kissed my cheek as I slapped him away.

“You smell worse than us,” Corbin said, sniffing my hair like my mom used to. “Like sadness. And heartbreak. And rejection.”

“Fuck off.” Grabbing a cup and pouring myself some coffee from the big, silver decanter, I shrugged. “The show must go on!” I lifted a spoon into the air dramatically.

“So it does, my friend.” Tucker handed me two packets of sugar. “Listen, bro, we know you’ve been feeling shitty lately about Asian Persuasion.”

I shot him a look. “Don’t fuck with me, Tucker. I have zero tolerance right now.”

“Dude, I get it. Okay…Abby. Can I say her name? I thought actually hearing it would make things worse.” He drummed out a beat against my shoulder.

It was true that it was difficult for me to hear her name, but it also brought me great memories. I loved the way it sounded, the way our names sounded together, actually—Liam and Abby.

Corbin plucked a spoon from the white linen tabletop and stirred my coffee for me. “But we wanted to say that, though we understand you were in love and got your heart broken, maybe it’s time for you to lie back now and enjoy the single life, the life you’ve built for yourself. All of this.” He gestured to the opulent hotel meeting room all around us. “Because who knows how long our stays at the Ritz are going to last, ol’ buddy? One day we’re here, next day we’re gone. You know?”

I nodded. “Deep, Corbin. Deep, but, uh…it’s not like I’m not trying. I started by taking Abby Shines off the set list, and look what happened there.”

A hot, tight hotel waitress strolled by, bending over to check for extra sugar under the table.

Tucker’s eyes widened at Corbin. “Dude, did you see that shit?”

“No, what?” Corbin asked.

“Tell you later. What were you saying?” Tucker turned his attention back to me, eyes bold and sincere.

“Never mind. All I was going to say was that the life I wanted ended up being my undoing.” I scoffed, pounding back my coffee. Where was a fifth of whiskey when you needed one?

“Not your undoing. Your curse maybe, but c’est la vie.” Corbin gave me a sympathetic smile. Most of the time, I had no fucking clue what Corbin was saying, but I appreciated his sentiment.

“They say that the road ain’t no place to start a family…” Tucker sang the old, familiar lyrics poetically, palm to his chest.

“Can you shut up with that already?” Corbin asked him, then turned to me. “He’s been singing that since yesterday.”

“Dude.” Tucker shook his head. “You can’t shut up Journey.”

Tuning out Tucker and Corbin’s antics, I took out my phone and opened up our fan page on Facebook, which I hadn’t done since that pic of me and Abby emerged. I needed to see the social media commentary that the reviewer had written about. Robbie’s assistant, Yami, had posted a pic of us onstage in the middle of a jump, all high energy, but the comments sucked.

Next time please play Abby Shines pleeeeeeese…

Awesome show! We missed that new song tho. Thought you were gonna play it.

I was there!!!!! Sick set but they took out Abby Shines and my girlfriend was super pissed. Suggest you guys bring it back for tonight’s show before there’s a riot…

I guess he’s over her.

Whoa. I had no idea people loved that song so much. A huge problem was, we were playing it or not playing it on a whim, whenever I felt like it. And while I may have felt inspired to write the music, once it was out there, it didn’t belong to me anymore. It belonged to them—our fans. And as a front man, it was my responsibility to give them what they wanted.

Another thought occurred to me. IF Abby checked up on us, if she read social media comments, if she read reviews and saw that I hadn’t played Abby Shines last night, she might think, like the fans, that I was over her.

I had to bring it back. I had to keep playing it as long as it took to bring her home.

To me.

---