Page 59 of Rock Strong

And kill the lights.

It was the last song before our first encore set, and good thing, too, because I needed the break to go backstage, lock myself in the bathroom, and remind myself not to text her anymore before returning to wrap up this carnival. I could only hope that some way, somehow, Abby would hear about the song.

And she’d see it for what it was.

The promise I was finally making her.

After the show, I was chillaxin’ in the VIP lounge with Robbie and a couple of our roadies, having a simple beer, munching on nachos, doing my best to stay away from the hard stuff. Though she wasn’t there to watch me stay in line, I imagined Abby looking on, approving of my new attitude.

My phone rang just then, and pulling it out of my pocket, I saw it was Helen FaceTiming me. “Hey, I’ll be right back,” I told Robbie, who watched me tromp off with a careful eye. I left the room to take the call in the hallway, pressing the accept button. “Hey, you.”

Helen’s face was sullen and puffy, and her nose was snotty. “Hey.”

“What’s wrong?” I asked, my instincts to protect her kicking in, despite her melodramatic bullshit weeks ago. “Where are you?”

“LA. I’m home.” She pressed her hands to her eyes and released them. “Can you talk?”

“Yeah, just finished twenty minutes ago. Was just hanging with Robbie. ’Sides, I thought you didn’t want to talk to me anymore.”

“Don’t give me shit, Liam. Just hear me out.” She was always pretty, even when she was crying. Right now, she was beautiful.

I felt bad for her, whatever was wrong with her, though I had a suspicion it had to do with me. “Okay. Shoot.” I turned the corner into a quieter hallway and slid my back down a wall until I was resting on the floor.

“Look, this isn’t easy for me to say,” she began, biting her lip to keep from crying harder. “But I’m sorry for acting like a douche when I was there. The thing is, Liam, I don’t think you know how much I love you. Or maybe you do. I don’t know.”

I thought about it. “I do. I mean, I know you love me, ’cause I love you, too. But I had no idea you feel the way you do. I didn’t know to which degree, I mean.”

“The way I do love you, Liam. Still do,” she said. Her lip quivered, as she fought to control it. Wow, I had no idea it was this bad. “And that’s just the problem. I can’t be around you anymore. It’s hurting me. The more I try to be near you, the more you don’t see me. I think I need to just find my own life, do my own thing. I loved managing merchandise, but being so near you when you don’t give a shit about me hurts me, Liam.”

“Who said I don’t give a shit about you?” I asked, my tone fierce. “Of course I do. You’re my best friend.”

“That’s not what I mean. God, Liam, you’re so dense sometimes!” She burst out laughing and crying at the same time, her tears degenerating into a soggy mess of hair and snot.

“I am not going to deny that.” I shook my head. “I’m sorry I can be an idiot.”

She wiped her whole face with a crumpled ball of tissue. “Okay then, listen to me, stupidhead. I just watched the Livestream. I heard that acoustic song you did with Wes. Honestly, I’m surprised it took that long to write one. I knew you would.”

I smiled. She knew my every move even before I did. We had one Livestream camera set up for family and friends on a website whenever they wanted to watch us perform. I honestly hadn’t even thought she’d care. “Wow, so you heard that? What’d you think?”

She shook her head slowly, and I thought she was going to start wailing, because the tears were coming fast. I had never seen Helen cry like this. “It was beautiful. Really beautiful. I hate you and love you for it at the same time.” She wiped her face then gave me a serious look. “You have to go see her, Liam.”

I said nothing. I knew she meant Abby. But she’d been ignoring my texts. That was as good a sign as any that she didn’t want to see me. Going to her in spite of that would seem pushy. Wrong. Like I didn’t respect her enough to know her own mind.

“She won’t have me, Helen. She’s done with me.”

“No. She loves you. I saw it. Her friend Rosemary saw it. Shit, everyone saw it, Liam. I’m sorry I set Giselle up to go see you, but I was scared. I’d never seen you in love like that before, so if I couldn’t stop you, I knew Giselle would.”

“But nobody stopped me. I still love Abby. I just…I never told her.”

Helen’s face cleared up just then, and a calm resolve washed over her. “Then you have to go to her. Tell her it was my fault. Tell her you were stupid. Tell her whatever you want, but tell her that you love her.”

“I did. I wrote her that song,” I said.

“And it was by far the best love ballad you’ve ever written, so if you don’t show up at her doorstep tomorrow, I’ll be hugely disappointed in you,” she said.

I couldn’t speak. I just watched her face pass through an amalgam of emotions. She must really love me to give her blessing like this, considering what she felt for me.

“Do it for me, Liam. If I can’t have your love, then I want Abby to have it. Please?”