Page 24 of The Hot Shot

I slipped the palm of my hand onto his muscular thigh, admiring the way that my clothes clung slightly tighter to his form than on my own body. I gulped harshly, loving the view of him in front of me.

“And that’s not a problem when we’re alone,” he said honestly. “I actually like it.”

“Well, I’m addicted.” I chuckled. “But I know I need to reign it in and find myself a way to keep control when we’re out in public.” I hoped that Sebastian was grateful for the truth from me, rather than me hiding it away. “It doesn’t mean I can’t…

“It’s just something new for you, too,” he said.

“Exactly,” I said, offering Sebastian a glass of orange juice in which he smiled widely at. It was like I just knew that would be his preference. “We just need to work on our personal connection more and allow that growth to come, so today can mark the start of that,” I uttered with conviction. “I can’t wait to give you a snippet into the life of Walker Kennedy.”

I watched Sebastian’s face light up and his mouth part as I passed him a set of cutlery. I kept parts about me secret because I was a private person, but it felt as if revealing my surname to Sebastian made something click within him. It meant he had a way to find me if he needed to and couldn’t for some reason reach me, but I wasn’t going to push for the same back from Sebastian. I understood his viewpoint was completely different and if anything would come to light today for Sebastian, I hoped it was the fact that I was patient and that he could see that I was willing to work at this at whatever pace he needed. I just wasn’t going to let him bury his emotions away. One day I hoped that Sebastian could stand tall and proud but for now, I’d happily take him any way I could and if that remained being a dirty secret that was hidden in the shadows, then so be it.

“These waffles are delicious and that compote… it’s to die for.” He groaned, making me chuckle at how such a small gesture could invoke so many butterflies to fly around inside my stomach. “I needed this.”

“Me too,” I admitted before taking another bite from my own plate. “We both did.”

* * *

The afternoon flew by with the pair of us curled up together feeding each other triple chocolate flavored cake, sharing just the one fork as we talked away about mindless things that wouldn’t have meant shit to many but to me, it meant the world. I could see just from Sebastian’s gaze that he was just as invested and also loving this time together as I was. I loved how we just divulged information while not thinking twice about it, like the fact that Sebastian told me that as a child he had a cat called Socks. The cat had become his best friend—much to his brother’s dislike—and he dressed him up at every opportunity while his brother laughed at him. The poor thing must have been petrified when he heard him heading his way. I was intrigued and all ears as he even revealed he had an allergy to plasters and that he would come out in hives, which would result in his mother yelling at his brother for threatening to put them on his back if he didn’t do as he wanted.

“What a spoiled little shit! How could he want to hurt you?” I kissed him gently. Sebastian wiped the smeared chocolate from the corner of his mouth and I made quick work of sucking his finger clean.

“That tastes good.” I moaned before licking the chocolate goodness from my lips. “I probably deserved it though. I was a terror to him as a kid.” He smirked, laughing back at me. “I have some great memories of some of the tricks I set up though.”

“I can’t see it. You’re always so clean-cut…” I laughed. “You were a jokester. What made you grow up?”

“Honestly? Life,” he said. “When I lost my mother and father at eighteen, I didn’t have much of a choice. I had to think about my future…” he said solemnly as I gripped his thigh and nodded. “I wouldn’t change it though after all, as it’s brought me to this moment.”

“I know you wouldn’t but that doesn’t mean that I can’t feel your pain,” I replied. I had to accept that my guy had so many broken pieces but I hoped that I could help him heal. “Life isn’t easy but now we have each other.”

I went on to tell him how I found my love of music thanks to my dad and that I despised the color green. It always made me feel like I’d be sick. I even told him about my habit of collecting items of meaning, showing him my small box that I kept under the bed of items, including the first stump of a ticket from a gig I played at and the invite to the event I first met him at.

I waited for Sebastian to show some recollection but instead he just ran his finger over the invite, being so gentle not to disturb the other items.

“We’ll just have to ensure you have many more items to add alongside this…” He smirked as I felt my eyes filling with water, hoping that the tears didn’t fall. I wasn’t normally someone who got emotional but somehow Sebastian had managed to delve deep and hit parts of me that I didn’t even know a person could. “You deserve to create a lifetime of memories and I now see how important I am to helping you do that.”

“Sebastian, you really are,” I choked back. I dipped my head, trying to hide away even though I knew that it was pointless. Sebastian could sense every emotion he’d evoked in me from his words. We had promised to be open with each other so I sucked it up and took in a deep breath before I lifted my head, catching his glistening blue eyes that were baring back at me. “No hiding.”

“No hiding,” he whispered, reaching over to stroke the stray tear away as it fell down my face. “Honesty, that’s what we said and this…” Sebastian took both his hands and cusped my jaw. “This is completely what we promised one another, to let each other in. It’s what we both need.”

“I couldn’t have said it better, even though I hesitated,” I admitted. I licked my lips before I decided to test him. I leaned in and touched Sebastian’s mouth in a soft caress, eliciting a shiver from him. “I want you to know everything about me, just like I want to know you.”

“Then we’re both working at the same speed. I wouldn’t have it any other way,” he said as he moved his hand to his hair and parted his fingers through the strands. “So, what does your week ahead look like? Are we going to have to wait until the weekend to see each other or can we…?”

“I hope not. A week without you would be hell,” I interrupted quickly, not caring if I sounded blunt. I knew that I was standing my ground, but I’d go crazy being without him for that length of time. It wasn’t as if I couldn’t be apart from him, but I’d only just got him in my life, and I wanted to keep Sebastian close so that I could help make this connection grow more while also not allowing us to drift apart.

“Well, this week is a busy week.” He huffed out, like the mention of work had put a huge weight on his shoulders. “The earliest I have any free time is Wednesday and then I need to go to the gym. It would be Thursday unfortunately and even then, I wouldn’t be able to get to you until maybe eleven or twelve and I would need to be at the office by six on Friday.”

“I’m working all night on Thursday.” I sighed. “I owed Dee the time back and I couldn’t ask Selia to take the short fall again; she’s already doing me a favor by working a few extra hours.” I ran my hand over my head and blew out a breath. “This seems like it’s not going to be as simple as I thought.”

“If it was easy, then would it be worth doing?” Sebastian asked as I pondered the question for a moment. “Point blankly, no,” he said without hesitation. “We both have busy lives and we’ll have to adapt but if we want this, then we’ll make it work.”

“That I can agree on.”

CHAPTER NINETEEN

SEBASTIAN

I didn’t want to go home last time if I was honest but I knew that if I stayed a second night in a row, it would only make the morning hell for me. I had to be at work for six am and I didn’t have my suit with me. I don’t think Brendan Rightside would have approved of me rocking up either late or in Walker’s band t-shirt and sweats for the day. I would’ve paid good money to see how far I could make the vein pulse on his forehead or how long it would take for him to snap and lose his cool. I wonder what he would have done if I had turned up to work in a sloppy state. I supposed that he could have fired me and thrown me out of the building but even I knew that was just wishful thinking.

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