Page 29 of A Constant Christmas

Once we are inside and seated, we order a couple of beers and some appetizers to share. There’s a live band playing on the small stage, and they’re pretty good. Well, they’re pretty good if you are really into the whole country music thing. Me? Not so much.

“So, Kansas, we head home tomorrow morning. Is there anything you didn’t get to do that you wanted to?”

She thinks for a moment before taking another sip of beer. “I don’t think so. I wish it would have snowed here I guess. This small town looks pretty when it’s blanketed in a layer of fluffy white goodness.”

“You and snow have a very interesting relationship, Kansas,” I laugh.

She shrugs. “I just like it. It’s like when it snows, the whole world goes quiet for just a little while. I like that moment of silence.”

“For someone who likes silence, you sure do talk a lot,” I joke, and she launches a jalapeno popper at my face. “Hey, I’m kidding,” I laugh. “You know I love you.”

“I love you more, Trust Fund.”

“Be honest. You fell in love with me for my money, didn’t you?” I ask knowing that if anything, Sam loves me despite my money. It used to be a big fight between us when we first got together.

She rolls her eyes. “Nope. One hundred percent your penis.”

I let out a loud gasp and throw my hand over my heart. “I’m insulted! I can’t believe that’s all you love me for.”

“Oh, hush,” she winks. “You know I love you for so much more than that.”

“Back at you, Kansas,” I take a moment to pause before I ask my next question. “So, what happens when we go back?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean do we go back to the way things were when you were so stressed out you were about to lose it at any moment? Or do you let me help you and we figure it out together?”

She smiles. “You and my dad both asked me that same question.”

“Well, what did you tell him?”

“Ty, I am not saying I’m going to be perfect, and I’m not saying that I want to try to change overnight, but I think my number one goal is to stop sweating the small stuff. I need to do more that makes me happy instead of trying to project this idea that I am the perfect wife and mother. I mean who is going to see that? Anyone who is around me knows I’m neither of those things anyway,” she giggles.

“Sam, I don’t know if there is such a thing as a perfect wife and mom. If they look like they are, chances are, there’s some shit going on underneath the surface. But I think you are about as close as it gets. You love the kids and me so much and you always try to make sure we are taken care of. I think that’s the definition of a great mom. Let me ask you something though. If you weren’t doing the wife and mom thing 24/7, would you want to still be doing the architect thing, or would you want to do something else?”

She thinks for a little while before answering. “Don’t get me wrong, I loved being an architect, but it’s not like I got some great fulfillment out of it. I think I would want to do something more meaningful.”

“Like?”

“Like doing something to help abused women or something. You know, before we had the kids, I was doing all sorts of charity work to raise money for the women and children’s shelter near us. I think I’d like to go back to doing something like that. Something that helps people who need it.”

My wife. Always fighting the good fight.

Damn, I love her.

*************************************************************

When we get back to the house, her dad is asleep in his recliner, so as quietly as we can, we slip down into the basement. Once we are down there, I walk to the bathroom and start running a bath, adding in some good-smelling bubble bath. After I light a couple of candles and flick off the lights, I invite Sam to join me.

We take our time undressing each other, and it’s more loving than sexual. Gently, I run my fingers over her skin as I remove each garment, amazed at how much this body of hers has given me over the years.

Once we are in the water, we sit on opposite ends of the tub, and I start rubbing her feet. She moans as I knead it between my fingers.

“Stop that, Kansas,” I tease. “You’re going to make me all excited.”

All she does in return is give me a sexy smile that says she enjoys it.

She leans her head on the back of the tub, getting lost in the moment. We are silent for a long while before I begin to speak.

---