Page 14 of A Constant Christmas

“I just don’t want to ruin our week.” Her eyes look up at mine with worry.

“Impossible.” I kiss her to try to ease her fears. “Now, let’s see which movie you picked.”

As the opening credits start to roll, Chevy Chase appears, and I realize we are watching Christmas Vacation for the one-hundredth time. And when I look over, Sam is trying hard to contain her giggle, but when she sees my face, her facade cracks, and she starts belly laughing.

Fuck it. If I get to hear her laugh like this, I will watch this movie a thousand more times.

Chapter Eleven

Sam

We spend the entire day watching Christmas movies while cuddled up on the couch. I try to stay in the moment with him even though some parts of the movies remind me of the girls. They always love Christmas movies as much as I do.

But I know they’re in good hands, and I’m sure they’re having fun. After all, Aunt Tess doesn’t have nearly as many rules as Mommy and Daddy. Hopefully, when we get home, they remember our rules.

During the movies, we chow down on junk food, and in between, we have long make-out sessions like we are in high school again. Just one kiss from him soaks my panties every time.

I lay my head in his lap as he strokes my hair, and we fall asleep off and on. I can’t remember the last time I took a nap. People always told me to ‘nap when the kids nap’, but unfortunately, that’s a lot easier said than done.

When it begins to get dark outside, he suggests we take a dip in the hot tub, and I am more than happy to oblige. We walk toward the back of the house to a room that is entirely made of glass, and I stop dead in my tracks.

The first time Ty and I came here to escape the world, we got in that hot tub with snow falling outside, and it was probably the most romantic, serene thing I’ve ever experienced.

And as I gaze out the windows now, fresh, white, fluffy snow falls onto the ground. It’s like the dark world is illuminated by the light ambiance of the snow. It’s just like it was all those years ago.

Beautiful.

Mesmerizing.

Perfect.

“Like a snowglobe,” I whisper.

That was what I compared it to back then. We were inside our own little glass paradise watching the snow falling outside. I always referred to this as the snowglobe room but never had we been back during the winter before.

Never had we had quite the same view that we did that first night here.

Until now.

“Come on, beautiful,” he whispers to me, pulling me toward the massive hot tub that sits in front of the glass wall.

Reaching for the hem of my shirt…or his shirt I should say…he slowly pulls it over my head. I’m completely naked underneath, but he is still wearing his t-shirt and sweatpants, so I take just as much careful time, removing them from his body.

When we are both undressed, he takes my fingers in his and leads me into the hot water. Every bit of stress in my body melts away as I sink to my shoulders.

He follows me, and once seated inside, he pulls me towards him. Wrapping his arms around me, he cradles my back against his chest as we just enjoy the moment.

We sit silently for who knows how long. It’s as if time stands still.

Finally, I turn around to look at him, linking my fingers around the back of his neck. I press a gentle kiss to his lips, and when I pull back, I say, “You know I love you, right?”

His expression is stern but soon is replaced with a warm smile. “Of course, I know that. Why would you even ask?”

“Because I feel like lately, I’ve been doing a pretty shitty job of showing you that I still love you. I’m always so worried about the kids which in turn makes me too tired to function, and I just don’t want you to think that I don’t love you. I love you so much. Without you, I don’t know where I would be. I’m so eternally grateful for all you and I have.”

Settling his hands on my hips, he pulls me a bit closer to him. “Listen to me. Never have I doubted for a second your love for me. Ever. I know how much you love the kids and me. It’s like you love us so much that sometimes you forget how to love yourself too.

“Sam, I didn’t plan this whole trip because I thought we weren’t in love anymore. Of course, I wanted us to reconnect and find that passion, but I never doubted what we have. I planned this trip so that you could maybe get your spark back. I fell in love with a tough-as-nails country girl who lived through hell and was made stronger because of it. Sure, being a wife and a mom is important, but I don’t want you to get so bogged down in being those things that you forget how to just be you sometimes.”

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