Page 44 of The Proximity Factor

“Bye,” I trailed off before I hung up. Lanie was going to be the end or the beginning of me. I didn’t think there was any in-between with her.

Her call left me pacing the house, running our conversation through my mind. I wondered what Lanie’s mom had said about me that had her so freaked out. Then, every so often, I would pause and stare at the title I held in my hand. For half an implausible second, I would contemplate taking Lanie up on her offer. In the next second, I would berate myself, even though I knew I was an honorable enough man to pay her back one way or the other. Her money would never be in jeopardy. But I worried how she would see me. How I would see myself.

Lanie was right. I was prideful. I always had been. My entire life, I’d been out to prove something, mainly that I was better than my father. And now it was Maren and Stephen I needed to prove myself to. But was I better than any of them if I kept pushing away the people who cared the most about me? That was some food for thought. I chewed on that until Lanie got home an hour later.

She came flying through the door to make sure I’d kept my promise to her. Relief flooded her face when she saw me pacing the living room floor. Lanie dropped her bag and came running at me in her tiny athletic shorts and curve-hugging T-shirt. She made her way directly to me and wrapped her arms around my middle, letting her head rest against my chest. “Hi,” she breathed out.

Still clutching the title, I didn’t hesitate to wrap my arms around her and rest my chin on her head. Breathing in her soft honey scent calmed my nerves. She felt right, righter than anything had in a long time. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”

“I know I can be a lot.” She giggled into my chest, but quickly ceased. “Actually, I’m going to be a lot again.” She leaned away and gazed up at me. “I have another idea. You probably won’t like it, but please hear me out.”

I braced myself but nodded. I owed it to her to at least listen.

She bit her lip in that adorable way of hers. “So, I can sell just about anything. We are talking anything and everything, from candy bars and tubs of flavored popcorn no one will ever eat, to wrapping paper and pancake breakfast raffle tickets. Not to brag, but I’m so good at it, our town wouldn’t have a new library or a commemorative statue of our forefathers if it weren’t for me. So, this is what I’m thinking: What if I come to your little expo thingy to keep an eye on you and my money?” She winked. “But most importantly to help you make sure you can pay me back and keep your car.”

I blinked, not sure what to think about her offer. But she almost had me sold with her pitch. There is no doubt she would excel as a used car salesperson. The thought of having Lanie with me was more than appealing, even though I couldn’t picture her at a gaming expo. An expo my ex-wife was going to be at. That would be interesting, assuming we ever ran into Maren and Stephen. The expo was huge, and they would be in the top-tier booths, so the odds of seeing them were hopefully low. And I didn’t want to sell my car, even though I knew it was probably inevitable. With all that said, besides my pride, there was a huge kink in her plan. “You know nothing about the gaming world.”

She gave me the cockiest of smiles and shrugged. “I don’t really need to. Besides, you’ll teach me all I need to know in the next week while we come up with the most amazing booth layout.”

“I didn’t agree to your plan,” I reminded her.

“But you didn’t say no.” She trailed her fingers up my back, driving me wild. “Come on, Parker. I know you want to say yes. And I know how weird and scary this is for both of us. Maybe our lives brought us to this place because we needed each other for this moment.”

I tilted my head. “Why would you need this?”

Her creamy and perfectly smooth cheeks glowed pink. “I know this sounds ridiculous, but I thought maybe this experiment was going to better humankind and I could say I was part of it.”

Suppressing my chuckle, I stayed composed. I’m not sure why she would think that, other than she was infectiously optimistic and wonderful.

“Obviously, I don’t think it’s going to.” She gazed into my eyes and held me as her willing captive before she did me in. “But maybe I can better your world and you can better mine.”

No one had ever said anything like that to me. The crazy part was, I believed if I gave her the chance, she would better my world. I wasn’t sure how I could help her, but I wanted to. My forehead fell to hers, bringing our lips inches apart. The ache and desire to erase those inches was sweet torture. My parted lips hovered over hers.

She lifted slightly on her toes, inviting me to do what I longed to.

I felt every sweet breath of hers. It lingered between us, tempting me more than any woman had ever tempted me before.

“I want to kiss you more than you know right now.”

“You have my permission. If that’s what you’re waiting for.” She moved in dangerously close and licked her lips, almost sending me over the edge.

But I was waiting for something. “I am more honored than you will ever know, and I promise to take you up on the offer soon. But first, let me be worthy of it.” I had to feel like I had something to offer her before I could get involved with her. I refused to drag her into the hellhole with me.

“You are—” she started to say.

“Shhh.” I pressed a finger to her inviting lips, barely wet from licking them in anticipation of the kiss that would have to wait. I regretfully took a step back and held up the only thing I owned of any worth. “Take the title to my car. I’m also going to give you the spare key to it. You hold on to them until I pay you back every cent I owe you. And if I don’t make good on it, sell the car and keep the money. Promise me you’ll do that.” I still couldn’t believe I was doing this. Taking a loan from her felt like such a loser move, but I was getting tired of trying to put out the dumpster fire on my own. And I had a feeling Lanie had a bigger fire truck than I did. Or at least more water in her arsenal at the moment.

Lanie studied me for a few seconds as if she wanted to protest, but then thought better of it. “Okay.” She took the title. “You have a deal. Let’s get to work.”

“Yes, ma’am. You’re the boss.” It was the first time in my life I couldn’t wait to get bossed around.

I WALKED INTO THE HOUSE Saturday night with a box of goodies in hand. I couldn’t wait to show Parker the cards I’d had printed with discount codes for his game. Even more exciting were the custom-made T-shirts with the most amazing graphics of Ruptured Worlds. The shirts were a surprise. I thought Parker and I could wear them at the expo next weekend.

As soon as Parker saw me walk in, he jumped up from his chair, wearing a headset. Pete, Ethan, and Javon were over, testing the last few bugs Parker had found. Parker came to me in no time, taking the box out of my hand with an adoring smile. It wasn’t the you-are-my-universes smile, but there was hope that someday that smile would be mine. For now, I was happy with this version, both the smile and the man. The version of Parker that held my hand and brought me my favorite snacks when we watched Gilmore Girls after a long day of prepping and planning for the expo, running cheer practice, and getting ready for the upcoming school year. The man who kissed my forehead every night before we parted, he to his room and me to my own. The agony of wanting more than just that sweet little kiss every night was killing me.

Sometimes I would lean against my door and have to talk myself out of pushing things. When what I really wanted was to twist the knob, march over to Parker’s room, and tell him, “Baby, let’s do this,” before laying the kiss of all kisses on him. But each time, I quelled my desire. More than anything, I wanted to honor his wishes because he was honorable. I’d never met a man who waited to kiss me because he needed to prove he was worthy of it, even though Parker was more than worthy. The mere fact he thought he needed to prove something to me said all I needed to know about him.

“Thank you. I can’t wait to show you what I got. The flyers and cards turned out amazing.” I had connections with a printer in town from my college days on the spirit squad. They gave me an awesome discount and moved me ahead of some other orders when I told them of our situation. And I may have brought them a few of Mama’s award-winning pecan pies that she had baked for the cause. The pies came with a heaping side of I’m-happy-you-and-Parker-are-sorting-things-out-and-I-know-I-can’t-tell-you-what-to-do-but-just-because-you’re-living-together-doesn’t-mean-you-should-live-together. She used air quotes and everything. Believe me, I knew what she meant. At this rate, she had nothing to worry about.

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