Page 112 of Cross the Line

“I get that,” Theo sighs, swallowing down his guilt.

“But,” Jason continues before Theo can start spiraling, “I’m also smart enough to realize that maybe, just maybe, what happens between you and Alec isn’t my business. Not entirely. He’s my brother and I’m always going to worry about him, just like I’m always going to worry about you. Two people I love getting involved, makes me want to get in the middle and make sure nothing goes wrong.”

“We’re not your football team. You can’t manage us.”

“I know,” Jason groans. “I kinda hate that. But even if I could, I don't think I should. Alec’s not a child and he can make his own choices. I’m not exactly going to tell him he’s making a bad one. You’re the best person I know, Theo. You’re smart as hell, you work hard and you care about people, and you always want to do the right thing.”

“And yet.”

“Stop interrupting my pep talk,” Jason says in that teacher tone of his. Theo can imagine that shuts his students up quickly. He might look like an oversized puppy, but he can be firm when he wants. “Good, now back to what I was saying. You’re the fucking best. I know you try to hide it behind your ugly-ass sweaters, and that ten-foot wall you built around yourself to keep friends and relationships out. But I knew one day someone would get past it and you deserve that, Theo. You deserve to be loved.”

“My sweaters aren’t ugly,” Theo retorts, because saying anything else is too hard right now. “Alec loves my sweaters.”

“Well, we all have flaws.”

“It’s gonna be like that, is it?” Theo asks, surprised that he’s almost smiling.

“Damn right. This is just like double fodder to tease the shit out of Alec. You know, when he’s…better.”

The mood sobers quickly, whatever relief he’d found at Jason’s steadfast acceptance is gone as he takes in the sterile walls and the scent of antiseptic in the air. For a few minutes it’d been all too easy to get lost in conversation, but reality has reared its ugly head bringing back remorse and worry in equal measure. Theo itches to find Alec, to see for himself that he’s alright and apologize. Apologize until he dies, do anything to get a second chance.

In a future of unknowns Theo knows one thing, he isn’t going to let Alec go without a fight.

“He’s out of surgery and in recovery now,” the surgeon says. He’s smiling, but Theo can’t bring himself to do the same. He isn’t going to feel better until he can see Alec for himself. The surgeon continues, “He had a stronger reaction to the anesthesia than expected, so he’s taking a bit longer to come out of it.”

Beside him, Charlie flinches and Andrew wraps a hand around his arm, giving it a squeeze. Not for the first time, Theo wonders what it might be like to have a twin who you can read like that.

“The break in his leg was a bit worse than expected once we got in there, which is why the surgery took longer. We won’t know the full extent of the damage or his recovery until the cast comes off, but for now we’ve done everything we can. He’ll likely be staying for a few days, but someone will let you know once he’s moved into a room and can have visitors.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Andrew says. “Can I speak to you privately for a moment?”

“Of course,” the surgeon replies, stepping into the hallway and leaving Jason and Theo alone with Charlie.

“Charlie,” Theo starts, cut off when Charlie holds up a hand.

“Andrew said I should tell you I’m sorry, but I’m not. I don’t think you deserve him. Lucky for you, what I think doesn’t matter because Alec’s a stubborn fucker and doesn’t care what other people think, so you better prove me wrong, Theo. Don’t hurt him again.”

With that he turns and walks away, throwing himself in one of the chairs in the corner and crossing his arms.

“Huh,” Jason hums. “You know Andrew should get a job as a diplomat. He’d do great.”

“I don’t know if I’d call that great.”

“He didn’t punch you, so I’d call it a success,” Jason says. “And Alec’s going to be okay.”

“I’ll feel better when I see him for myself,” Theo says softly, fighting away the moisture in his eyes when Jason squeezes his shoulder.

“Soon,” Jason promises.

It is not soon. Alec’s reaction to the anesthesia proves to be worse than any of them expect. They let Charlie back into the recovery area to help with soothing his post-anesthesia confusion, but when Charlie comes back out into the waiting room an hour later, his eyes are red and he proceeds to the bathroom and pukes. The only thing he will tell any of them is that Alec is struggling, then Charlie reverts into his turtle shell and refuses to speak to anyone but Andrew.

The sun has set by the time Alec’s moved to a private room, the weight of the day's long wait hanging heavy over all of them. According to the nurses, Alec had been plagued by intense nausea and chills post-anesthesia, which combined with hospital overcrowding, had led to a half-day lag in him being moved. The waiting was plagued by phone calls, and Andrew spent hours on his cell phone handling what no one else wanted to, arranging his parents’ return flight and fielding the dozens of phone calls from Alec’s friends who had all wanted to come visit once they found out what happened. How any of them got Andrew’s cell number was something Theo never got a chance to ask. Thankfully Andrew was able to keep everyone from visiting, considering he didn't even have a room. Theo strongly suspected Andrew used some of his mediator powers, because he’d had no less than half a dozen calls from Riley and Antonio alone, yet somehow he managed to convince even them not to come see Alec until tomorrow.

The mood is heavy by the time Theo and Alec’s brothers finally make their way down the hallway to see Alec. Everyone looks exhausted, and it’s clear they’re all as apprehensive as they are eager to get their eyes on Alec. The only one who’d been able to go back to see him in recovery had been Charlie, and he’d been kicked out once the worst of side effects kicked in, their only updates coming from sporadic nurse visits.

“He’s going to be okay,” Andrew says to no one in particular.

“Course he is,” Charlie says, the slightest quiver to his voice. “I’ll kill him if he’s not.”

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