Page 14 of Temptation at Randy's

“Wasn’t there anyone on your side?” Huh? Arlene was frowning when I looked up. “I mean, I don’t really remember much, and I don’t think I read many of the comments, but surely…”

“Please don’t. Read the comments, I mean.”

Ben had banned me from reading them after I got the gist with the first… hundred, or so. I’d been tempted to go through them again over the years, but… Nothing good came from reading hate comments. That was basic knowledge if one wanted to survive.

I didn’t think anyone actually followed it, but…

“No, no,” she backtracked quickly, “I wasn’t going to, definitely not now. I just meant?—”

“I got it.” My smile had to look as strained as it felt. “Can we change the subject, though? Please.”

“Sure. I mean, of course.” Arlene swallowed, her eyes widening in terror. I grimaced. I didn’t mean to send her into a panic. “What do you wanna talk about? Ugh, I’m terrible at this.”

“I don’t know.” I wouldn’t say I shared her sentiment, but I was clearly not the greatest either. Maybe I could hide under the fact that I was out of practice. It sounded cringe, but… it was kind of true. Back in LA, I mostly hung out with Ben and whoever he’d wanted to hang out with. Here, I’d been more social, but always in groups. There was a different skill set to navigate groups and one-on-one interactions. “I’m at a disadvantage here.”

“Are you?”

It hit me as I spoke the words. Yes, yes, I was.

“I mean, yeah.” Arlene chewed on her lip when I leaned forward. I’d feel bad if I thought the intrusion was unwelcome, but… That wasn’t the vibe I was getting. Besides, there was no better way to know a person than to tease a bit. “What drew you to the munch, other than seeing the ad for it?”

“Oh, that.” She looked away for a second, her hands fidgeting with the hem of her sweatshirt. I had to say, it was an odd choice of clothes for a… date—or whatever this was—but I dug it. It made me want to squeeze her. It wasn’t a sensation I was super familiar with. “I guess I’ve always been curious, but it’s always seemed too intimidating. Or I didn’t have the time, or… You know.”

“What are you curious about?”

If someone told me they were curious about something, that was their downfall. Something switched in my brain, and I needed to understand everything.

“The… intimacy, maybe?” Arlene groaned. I wasn’t sure I understood why. “I sound so lame, don’t I?”

“I don’t know.” I really was not the person to answer that question. “Intimacy is so underrated, though.”

“Right?” She perked up there, her eyes glistening with the kind of relief that sucked me in. “But yeah, I think it’s a combination of the intimacy, and the consent, and worship, and… Well, the sexual stuff too, obviously.”

I tilted my head to the side.

Arlene must’ve misinterpreted it because she rushed in with another of her explanations. “I mean, not obviously, obviously. Ugh. Why am I like this?”

“It’s fine.” I chuckled. “You’re sweet, but I swear I’m not offended.”

“You’re not?”

I shrugged. I had to tread carefully if I didn’t want to send us back to square one and questions about the video that should’ve never been uploaded, but…

Huh.

I actually wanted to talk to her, to explain. “Sometimes, I still don’t really know if I’m gray, or demi or what, but that label is only about my attraction to people.” It would’ve been my turn to fidget, but I reined it in. “And, yeah, I’m not a horn dog or anything, but if I want to get in the mood, kinky scenarios are gonna get me there more easily.”

Okay. I’d explained it, she didn’t look at me like I’d grown three heads, and I didn’t feel like clawing out of my skin.

That counted as progress, right?

“That makes sense, I think.” Arlene wrung her hands together. “You said you’ve been to munches before, right?”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “A couple of times. I like Cin.”

“Yeah.” Arlene chuckled. “I mean, they were a bit intimidating for me? But everyone is, honestly.”

“Aw.”

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