Page 35 of Beyond the Fame

Yes.

Talking to Rebecca on the water earlier today was... nice. Aside from Mylan and my therapist, I’ve never revealed that much about myself or my feelings to anyone. Even in the press, I keep my words limited to work, only offering small glimpses into my private life. She didn’t even judge me when I talked about therapy, my parents, or me abandoning Mylan.

“Just... try it. Try not to be an asshole to her.”

“She’s the asshole.”

“Fine, you’re both assholes. Maybe you can bond over it.”

I scoff. “She hates me. What’s the point?”

“Are you sure?”

“What?”

“That she hates you? I mean, I’ve seen the way she looks at you. And the way you look at her.”

I cringe internally, remembering saying those exact words to Mylan that one day on set years ago when I realized how important Lana was to him and the hope it gave me that she could be the one to save him from his disease.

I was right.

Doesn’t mean he’s right, though.

The dealer lays down the turn, another ace. Four of a kind? I got four of a kind? Hell yeah.

Bruno’s face is set in stone as he makes another bet against Mylan. Mylan curses under his breath and folds.

“Show your cards,” the dealer says, and I toss mine over towards the pile of chips in the center.

Bruno whistles. He has three kings. Even if the river reveals another king, my four of a kind would trump his.

I won. Holy shit. I won. I never win. I’m typically a horrible poker player.

The dealer turns the final card, and it’s a seven of clubs.

“Congrats, Jenny.” Mylan claps his palm on my shoulder. I don’t even care that he called me the nickname and scoop the pile of chips towards my chest. I’m smiling. Big, hurting-my-cheeks smiling.

Mylan leans into me and says, quietly, “Why don’t you go find someone and celebrate?”

He shows me a text on his screen from Lana saying Ginger’s bachelorette party is over. She’s back in their room in their suite and is ordering him back to—okay, the rest of that text was not meant for my eyes.

If Ginger’s party is over, that means Rebecca is probably back in our suite too.

Without saying a word, I stand and turn away from the table.

“What about your chips?” Bruno yells after me.

“Keep them.”

“It’s like $10,000,” he adds.

“Wedding gift,” I say and exit the poker room.

My steps pick up as I move through the casino. I can’t think about what I'm about to do because then I'll second guess myself. I’ll let my fear consume me and shut down these intense feelings for Rebecca; feelings I keep pushing down and now they’re ready to burst free.

I concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other. The casino’s not that big, and it’s right next to the lobby, so it’s less than a minute before I’m at the row of elevators. There's a crowd waiting, and I consider taking the stairs up nine floors, but the elevator closest to me opens, and I slip in before the crowd converges.

Of course, everyone is getting out on a different floor.

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