Page 61 of Tortured Tones

“This is Luther’s game. He knows I’m not unfit. Therapy confirmed that. Taking Josh was his way of hurting me. He likes to keep me on a leash and knows I’ll do anything for our kid.”

“Fuck.” I swiped my hand across my chin. “What an asshole.” No wonder she was harsh, tough, brutal. She’d witnessed things I hoped I’d never have to in my lifetime. She’d lost loved ones, and she’d been more fucked over by love than me.

“Oh, he is.” She set grit into her tone. “I had enough guilt over snapping at work and failing to do my job right, but being made out to be an unfit mom was the lowest of cruel blows. But it hit me with some realities too. I wasn’t in a good place after Mom died. I wasn’t enjoying my job. So I quit, got help, and found a new career. But Luther doesn’t care. He throws his money and power around and defeats me every time I legally try to get more time with Josh. He’s done it to me twice—I won’t let him do it again.”

“So he’s a controlling, narcissistic prick?”

“That sums him up.” She folded and rested her elbows on the table. “But next time we go to court, I will win. He’s got nothing over me. I’ve passed every physiological assessment. I don’t put a foot out of line. I’m changing roles at work.”

That was news. “You’re giving up being a security guard? I thought you loved it.”

“I do. But Luther’s lawyers have made my job sound more dangerous than being a targeted crack-loaded henchman for the Mexican mafia. So to remove any contention, I’m taking on an office-based, admin management role for our company. I hate having to give up field work, active duty, and the travel, but it’s what I have to do to make the court happy.”

Wow. Changing careers for your kid was extreme. I could never give up music.

For someone who had been through so much, she projected nothing but strength. She seemed to have her shit together. There was nothing she wouldn’t do for her kid. I admired that. Her love for her son blew my mind.

Would I feel that way about Charlotte one day?

I hoped so.

My kid ran around the fort, chasing small, yellow butterflies. She’d certainly made an impact.

“Is your new role the reason why you’re not coming overseas with us?”

“Yes.” She nodded. “This job helped me get my life back on track. It’s enabled me to service and protect people in a new way, helped restore my confidence, and reaffirmed I’m a good mom.” She threw me a saucy smirk “And they don’t mind if you have to rough someone up who’s been a dick every now and then...within reason of course.” She made light of what had happened, but no doubt the scars ran deep.

“Like me?”

“I had to put you in your place to prove I’m good at what I do.”

“I never doubted you.” Maybe for a split second.

“I made sure you didn’t.” A hint of color touched her cheeks just before her gaze darted toward the street. A black Mercedes was parked beside my car. Shit. How long had it been there? We’d been so engrossed in talking, neither one of us had noticed it.

She snatched her cell phone out of her jacket and snapped a photo of the car side-on.

I appreciated the need for security, but sometimes it turned me into a nervous wreck. Excluding the last few minutes, I’d become more aware of my surroundings lately than ever before. More paranoid.

Charlotte was digging in the sand. The moms were feeding their babies. A man walked a dog across the park.

“Is everything okay?” I asked Ava.

The car took off and she nodded. “Uh-huh.”

I stuffed my hands into my hoodie’s pockets. The wind was picking up and held a chill. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to distract you. But thank you for telling me about Josh. Now I understand why you’re so hard on me about Charlotte. You and I are more alike than you think.”

“How so?” She put her phone away.

My shoulders slumped, and my chest ached. “We’ve lost loved ones. We’ve made mistakes, big and small. Sometimes, no matter how much you try to do the right thing, be perfect, your efforts are never good enough. You hate failing and fucking up. You feel guilty over letting people down.” No amount of therapy in the past had helped me. “But that doesn’t stop you from doing everything possible to protect those you love and care about. You want to do what’s right for your kid. I don’t want the court to rule me as unfit either.” But were my career and lifestyle cause for concern? What hope did I have?

“Only you can fuck that up, so don’t.” She handed me her now empty cup. “Your head is in the right place—make sure your heart is too.”

“I will. It is.”

“Good.” A small smile crossed her lips.

I’d never met someone who was so different but so like me. Everyone was dealing with shit—just on different levels. I prayed everything worked out. Ava needed Josh...her family. And Charlotte needed hers. She needed to be in Hannah’s and Paul’s lives...and mine.