Page 157 of Loving the Liar

“Ella—”

“All the men around me have only ever had one thing in mind. To control what I do and who I am. You’re just one among many others to have participated.”

He pinches his lips. “Is that what you think of me?”

“Did you have my best interests in mind?”

“Did you want to get married to Harvey?”

“I wanted to go to Juilliard,” I bite out, my chest aching. “For fuck’s sake, do you not care?”

He keeps his cool, letting me simmer in my anger as he takes another sip. “Do you think Harvey James would have let you stay at Juilliard, Ella?”

I keep quiet since we both know the answer is no.

“You’d still be in the Circle, married young, with your life out of your control. But to someone other than me. And I…I would have to watch you suffer.”

“Poor you,” I snort. “Now at least you have to watch me suffer because of you.”

“You and I are meant to be, and you know it. Or I wouldn’t have taken the risks I took dating you through high school, you neither. Agree or disagree, I don’t care. I know it. I understand your frustration, but it won’t last. Down the line, your love for me will flourish again. It’s not extinguished. But please, tell me if I’m wrong.”

Again, I don’t want to lie, so I grit my teeth, giving up on food.

“Eat,” he says as soon as I drop my fork. “Ask me another question.”

“How long have you been Hermes?” The questions are burning my tongue, the food twisting my stomach. But I want to know it all.

“More or less since I came back. The post about you knowing about your dad’s parties was my first one.”

My mouth drops open. “How could you?”

“The second I saw how important your reputation was, I had to go for it. How can I be your last option if you have something to turn back to? Plus, I had to be ruthless, or Duval would have never believed it was Megan. I hated doing it, Sweets. Please, believe me when I say that. But I had to attack you so he would think it’s her. It was my only plan to take her down. Make it look like she’s attacking a girl she hates so much that she would put the Circle at risk.”

“And you also had to put us against each other?”

“She did that very well on her own.” A small smile tips the corner of his mouth. “But I guess I did push it when I couldn’t keep my hands off you, my eyes off you, your name out of my mouth. It was too tempting to rile her up. And it did help.”

“I can’t eat any more,” I squeak. “I’ll be sick.”

“Okay,” he says softly. “Just leave it. But promise you’ll tell me if you’re hungry again.”

“I might never.” I take a sip of my soda. “Do you know who the real Hermes is? How did you hack into their account?”

“I don’t. And Jake got me in.”

Of course, he used his best friend who’s a computer genius.

“How respectful for my brother that his two best friends united against him.”

“Again, your brother only wants you to be happy. And I know I will make you happy.”

“So let me clarify. You broke up with me. You ruined my chances at getting into my dream school. You pretended to my mom and brother you would protect me from the Circle while secretly initiating me so you could use me and require my presence by your side whenever you wanted. You destroyed the life I built as SFU, stalked me. All the while scheming to get rid of Megan. But you think you can make me happy?”

He takes in every single one of my words, nodding to himself as if checking I’m not forgetting anything rather than defending himself.

“I’m glad you’re not adding killing your dad to the list.”

I snort. “I’m stupid enough to believe you were protecting me from him.”

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