Page 30 of Our Blood, Our Pain

“What? You wanna spar me?”

“Yep. Tonight when things have calmed down, we’re heading to the gym and you will sweat this out.”

During this little chat, I fail to notice that our lips are almost touching. Kai’s body is vibrating under my touch and it thrills me to the core. He loves the authority, the push and pull, and fuck do I love it too. My dick gets hard even thinking about grappling with him later.

“You gonna hurt me, Jules?” he whispers, so faintly that I nearly miss it. His eyes are heavy, his breathing deep and rapid. That delicious pink tongue pokes out to moisten his lower lip.

“Yeah. I think I am. And you’ll fucking love it. The pain. The blood.”

“I think you mean our pain, our blood. I won’t go easy on you, either.”

“You better not.”

I’m so fucking tempted to take those lips with mine right now, but the moment is disturbed by a loud bang of the door behind us where Lev appears with Aaron. They look like they’ve taken a bath in blood. Great. Clean up will be a blast.

“You can start clean up, we’re done for the day. But Jules, tomorrow we’re going to talk about your little outburst earlier,” Lev says, which I expected.

“I figured,” I say, just as they both walk away, an air of contentment emitting off them both, which resets the previously filled tension in the house to a more peaceful state.

“You go get yourself something to eat. Me and Simon need to get started on clean up.”

Without responding, Kai just nods, and I watch him slowly walk away down the hall, admiring his perfect bubble butt, hoping I get a chance to squeeze the life out of it later.

19

KAI

I'm on the verge of a breakdown. The past twenty-four hours have been a whirlwind of emotions, stuck between running away where no one can find me, drowning in a never-ending sea of guilt, wondering about all the ‘what ifs’ had they not found Aaron in time. Being in the holding pen earlier today was not at all like I expected. I was numb. Maybe from shock, or maybe I was too afraid not to follow through, but it didn’t upset me or even disgust me. The problem is that I don’t know who I am anymore. Leaving home, I had hopes that my life would become clear, and I would have direction. But the opposite has happened. The years of pretending to be someone I’m not, the mask I wore in my everyday life has been shredded here, and it scares me. Do I even have a choice now? If I wanted to pack my bags and leave, would the brothers allow it? That’s not even including the mindfuck that is Jules. His harshness is my undoing and yet another thing I didn’t know about myself. I like his edge, his threatening controlling manner. At least I feel something real when I’m around him. But whether that's a healthy emotion or not, I think I need to revisit that on a day where the rest of the shit in my head is sorted out.

Grabbing my gym gear, I undress out of my pants and shirt, and put on my basketball shorts and a tank top. Nerves and excitement war with each other over this little sparring session Jules has planned for me. Maybe it will help. Just as I begin to tie my laces, a knock on my door has me looking up to see Jules entering the room. Fuck me. Why didn’t I think about this more? He’s wearing the same clothing as me, and Christ does he look sexy. I know I’m staring. I have no idea if he’s spoken or not as I can’t stop fixating on that massive solid chest. Since when did Jules have tattoos? Across his pecs he has some kind of tribal pattern that pokes out from behind his tank top. I want to rip it off so I can see the full thing. Trace it with my tongue.

“Kai, did you hear me?”

I really have to try hard to force my eyes higher to his face, but I manage it.

“What?”

“I said, are you ready to go?”

“Yeah. Can’t wait to kick your ass.”

A deep rumble leaves Jule’s throat. All dirty and full of innuendo. I would blush if I wasn’t so damn eager.

“It’s me that does the ass kicking. As you’re about to find out.”

My cock is thrilled by the idea, but I tame him best as I can since the material on these shorts hide fuck all.

“I think you’re all mouth.”

“And I think you’re stalling. Come on.”

I follow Jules out of the room as we head toward the main house. He’s certainly taking my mind off all that’s happened and I‘m grateful for the reprieve. Even if it’s just for an hour.

Lev and Dima’s gym is pretty sweet. They have the standard set up with weights in one section of the open-plan area, then on the other side of the room are two punch bags that hang from the ceiling in the corner. In the center of the room, a dim glow from the lights casts a warm hue over the mats that cover the floor.

Since I've been here, I've used these facilities many times. But never when I've been in here has it felt so oppressive. And I mean so oppressive that you could take a bite out of the thick tension in the air. The fact that we’re not speaking adds to that tension. Call me crazy, but things are about to change. I can feel the seismic shift between us. For days it's been building and I don't think either of us can hold back any longer. I know without a shadow of doubt, if Jules touches me, I won't be able to pull away.

Jules removes his tank top, sneakers, and socks, and stands in the middle of the mats. Obviously I have to take a moment to peruse that fucking masterpiece of a body. I don’t question the lack of clothing and I remove the same things. Jules’s eyes scan my chest and abs, he licks his lips like I’m a main course he wants to dine on, and fuck do I want that. Slowly I approach him until we are a foot apart. Jules’s chest rises and falls with the same anticipation that is rushing through my own body. He takes a step back, his muscular frame flexing, ready to start.

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