Page 52 of Hell Bites

I must have really lost my mind if I thought any of that was a good idea.

“Azizia, darling, come sit by me. Prazin will be here any moment.”

I get up from my chair by the window and move to sit on the sofa with Xadrian.

How quickly I became complacent again. How quickly I fell into old routines of doing exactly what he says.

Only this time is different. Though no less pathetic on my part.

Xadrian hasn’t sent me to his men. He hasn’t watched while they defile me and do whatever it is they please. He isn’t sitting by and shouting for them to go harder or faster or spread my legs wider so he can see them tear me open. He hasn’t let them touch me at all. I’m grateful for it, but I can’t help but feel like it’s bad. Like it means something worse is coming.

Xadrian has been nothing but kind to me since I’ve been back, and it’s messing with my head. He can’t possibly have changed, right? And he definitely wasn’t like this before. I know he was a maniac. He was horrible. It’s why I left, right? That’s why I left?

Right?

I’m questioning everything these days.

I don’t even know how many days it’s been. They’re all bleeding into one another, I can’t keep track. I wouldn’t know night from day if Xadrian didn’t have me go to bed with him and wake up with him each night and morning.

Everything seems so… off. I feel like I’m in a bubble. Like everything around me is just a little wonky. Like maybe I’m in a simulation—a video game or a movie or something. I zone out all the time. I’ll finish with breakfast, sit in the library, and seconds later it’s lunch time. I don’t know if I’m losing my mind or if this is just another torture tactic from Xadrian. If it is, I don’t think it’s working. I don’t feel tortured, I just feel like I’m going crazy.

Is that his goal? Does he want me to go crazy? I can’t tell, and it’s not like he’ll tell me.

“You remember Prazin, right?”

I nod. “Yes.”

Though, I don’t. I can’t recall all the men he had in and out of this place. There were always so many. Too many to keep track. All I can remember about them is they were evil. As evil as he is. He doesn't associate with anyone who is good, anyone I could trust.

“Good. So you’ll be on your best behavior then.”

“Always,” I answer numbly.

“That’s why I love you, darling.”

He kisses the side of my head, his lips like ice.

I hate him.

That’s the only thing I feel lately. Hate. So much hate. Not only for him, but for everything and everyone.

For his men. The guards. The help. For my brother. For Felix. That alien.

For every single person who let Xadrian get me back and hasn’t done a damn thing to help me.

I’m just here, going crazy, and no one cares.

No one cares!

“Sir, Prazin is here to see you,” someone says from the doorway. It’s a male voice. One of Xadrian’s guards probably. Or maybe Ziggy. I don’t even have the energy to be happy to see him anymore. He hasn’t tried speaking to me which is probably best for both of us. If Xadrian finds out what he did… I don’t want to think about it.

The sofa creaks as Xadrian gets to his feet. Like a zombie, I do the same, following after him. He’s talking to a man who’s dressed in an all black three piece suit. The only bit of color is the blood red pocket square.

“Prazin, you remember my lovely wife, Azizia?”

“Ah, yes, of course. How could I forget such a sweet morsel?”

My stomach rolls with nausea, but I hardly notice. It’s so normal these days that it doesn’t bother me anymore. I remember this man now though. He fed from me. But not because he is a vampire, because he is sick. Disturbed. He is a true monster. But who else would my husband associate with?

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