Page 86 of Smut

“Now what?” Amanda asks, gripping her plunger.

“Well, I guess since we can’t kill him, we can’t manhandle him either.”

“So I can’t bat him across the room? Because that spider in Home Alone put up with a lot.”

“No,” I tell her with a disappointed sigh. “They’re delicate. If you were to handle him and drop him, he could die.”

“Accidents happen,” she says slowly.

Man, do I love this woman’s brain.

I’m smiling but I shake my head and quickly wipe it off my face.

“No. Think of Kevin.” I’m saying it more for myself.

I creep forward.

She creeps forward.

Fluffy turns to her.

She freezes.

He turns to me.

I freeze.

Amanda makes her move.

She comes at him with the plunger from behind, getting him moving.

He comes scuttling toward me on those fuzzy eight legs.

Somehow I lower the magazine and he crawls right onto it.

Now I’m holding the magazine at eye level and Fluffy is sitting on it and I’m screaming silently, mouth open and everything.

A living nightmare.

“Get him to his cage!” Amanda yells.

I’m naked, with Fluffy balancing on a magazine, and somehow I make my way down the hall, to the study, and place the entire magazine inside, my hands shaking nonstop.

I withdraw my arms in shock and Amanda quickly puts the lid back on as Fluffy scampers into one of his logs to hide.

“Okay,” she says, taking in a deep breath, “you say he’s an escape artist, but you left the damn lid off.”

I blink. “Shit. I guess I was too preoccupied to pay attention.” I give her a look. “With you.”

She frowns. “If you’re trying to be sweet…”

“It’s true. I normally don’t forget to put the bloody lid on. If anything, it’s all your fault for being enticing.”

She rolls her eyes but grins. She takes my hand. “Come with me, naked and afraid man.”

Right. The naked thing.

Everything that’s happened post-sex hasn’t been my finest moment. No wonder the women are only around for one night.

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