Page 44 of What Happened Last Night

Carlotta

Although I had intended to go straight down to the precinct and tell Detective Del Rey everything, I found myself automatically heading toward home, my feet taking me there almost of their own accord. Several times, I almost turned around and twice, I hailed a cab and then changed my mind. It seemed like now that I was being confronted by the reality of telling the police everything, I just wasn’t ready to do it.

The priest’s words of comfort still echoed through my mind, reminding me that by telling the truth, I was not only absolving myself of my own sins, but I was also helping William onto the right path to absolve his sins and that had to be a good thing, both morally and spiritually.

The trouble was, once outside the calming atmosphere of the church, the panic inside me was back, and it was harder to ignore the gnawing dread in my stomach than I had thought it would be. The church was a sanctuary, where doing the right thing felt like the only path, because it blocked out everything else, allowing me to ignore all the niggling doubts in my mind. Outside those walls, all of those little niggling doubts were back, and nothing seemed so simple anymore.

Before I knew it, I was back on our block. My feet had brought me here subconsciously, even when I told myself I was just walking for a while, clearing my head and regaining that calm feeling I had experienced inside the church.

As I reached the house, I told myself I would take today to really think things over and then I would sleep on it. And then tomorrow, I would go to the precinct and talk to Detective Del Rey if I still thought it was the right thing to do. I felt a little bit better the moment the decision was made, but I suspected that my feeling of dread would return two-fold in the morning when I was once again faced with having to tell the detective everything, because no matter how long I gave myself to think it over, the priest had been right. The truth was the only way if I wanted to absolve myself of my moral sins, and I really did want that.

I pushed the thoughts away as I stepped into the house. I went through to the kitchen and put the kettle on. I turned around as I heard William come into the room behind me. He looked a little bit more sober than he had before I left, but he smiled strangely when he saw me, like he was a little bit smug about something. I ignored the look, not wanting to get into yet another argument with him.

“Where have you been?” William asked.

“Nowhere,” I replied too quickly. I wasn’t ready to tell him I had been to see a priest. He would know exactly where that one was going. “I just went for a walk to clear my head a bit.”

“Yeah, I can understand that,” William said.

He nodded sympathetically, and for a moment, I allowed myself to think that maybe, just maybe, he had taken some time to think about his recent actions and was ready to apologize to me. I couldn’t have been more wrong, and I really should have known an apology wasn’t William’s style. I kept giving him chances to redeem himself, to show me that I should keep his secret because he cared about me, about our marriage, and he kept on throwing them all back in my face.

“It must be hard knowing that you’ve gotten so repulsive that even your own husband can’t get it up for you,” he added.

That hurt. Even though I knew that William’s issues weren’t really anything to do with me—he couldn’t get it up because he was a drunk with some serious anger issues, it seemed—it still felt like he had shoved a knife into my heart and twisted it. I forced myself to hold the hurt in and not let William see that he had touched a nerve with me. If he thought he had hurt me, he wouldn’t be upset or apologetic. He would gloat and would use the insult whenever he wanted to hurt me again.

Only if you let him get the chance. You could end this whole thing right now. Just call the detective, I thought to myself, but I pushed the thought away. Tomorrow, I reminded myself. After I had some time to think things through and calm down from this latest onslaught from William.

Instead of taking the bait, I just rolled my eyes. The kettle clicked off and I was glad to be able to turn my back on William to make myself a cup of tea. I didn’t offer him one. Maybe it was petty, but I really didn’t want to do anything for him right now. I went to the fridge to get the milk out without so much as glancing in William’s direction. I finally did look at him when a knock sounded at the front door.

“Are you expecting someone?” I asked.

“No,” William said, but for a second, I thought I saw something on his face. A flash of guilt, perhaps. Or maybe spiteful joy. I couldn’t be sure I had seen anything really, and I told myself I was being paranoid.

“I’ll go and get rid of them, whoever it is,” William added, and he turned and left the kitchen, pulling the door half-closed behind him.

I added a splash of milk to my tea and put it back away in the fridge, straining to hear anything from the front door as I went. I could hear muffled voices coming from the front door, but that was it. I couldn’t make out any words. I couldn’t even tell if the visitor was male or female.

It’s probably someone selling something, I thought as I picked my cup up and began to sip from it. It must be something like that, because if it was someone we knew, William would have let them in by now.

A wry smile played out across my face. William had used his words to hurt me once again, thinking he could make me feel worthless and keep me in line. Instead, his words had the opposite effect on me. They were the final step in convincing me that the truth needed to come out about Candy. I mean, why should I continue to put myself at risk to protect William? It was different when I thought he loved me, but he’d made it abundantly clear that he didn’t. Not anymore. He had made the most difficult decision I had ever had to make a little bit easier with his constant taunts.

My resolve to tell the truth slipped ever so slightly when William came back into the kitchen with Officer Dumont trailing behind him. I took a long drink of my tea and then looked at the officer.

“Officer Dumont, what can we do for you?” I asked cautiously.

“Detective Del Rey would like you to accompany me to the precinct, Mrs. Alden. He has some questions for you,” Officer Dumont said.

I kept my expression neutral, but my heart sank. I could see the glee in William’s eyes as he looked at me. He made no effort to conceal it, and this time, I knew I wasn’t being paranoid. He was fucking enjoying this. That bastard had sold me out. I didn’t know what he’d told the police, but I knew he had told them something. Something that would implicate me in a murder he had committed. How hadn’t I seen this coming? He had always put himself first, and I had been stupid enough to think that for once, he would work with me instead of against me. As if he would risk himself getting what he deserved when he could blame me instead. Particularly when it was something this serious.

“Now isn’t really a good time, Officer,” I said, testing the water with the officer, wanting to see how much he thought he knew. The truth was that I really had nothing better to do, but I wanted to know what would happen if I said no to the precinct. “Perhaps the detective could drop by later on this evening.”

“Actually, that won’t be possible, Mrs. Alden. I am going to need you to accompany me right now,” the officer said.

“Am I under arrest?” I asked.

“Not if you come willingly. But if you refuse to come with me, then I’m afraid you’ll leave me with no choice other than to arrest you,” Officer Dumont replied.

“Then let’s go,” I said.

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