Page 23 of Sinners MC: A MC Anthology

Focus. Focus. Focus. “It’s important, please.”

He shook his head and turned to face me, offering me his cold, neutral stare.

Words didn’t come out of my mouth, as I got lost in his eyes. Those eyes…they spoke so much more than his mouth did. They always gave off his feelings and his thoughts. His eyes were the only reflection of his emotions.

Even though they were neutral, I could still see those buried emotions within him. I always would.

He rolled his eyes. “Are you just going to stand here and waste my time or are you going to speak?”

Yes, the talk.

“Yeah…I wanted to talk about why I wasn’t…there for you?”

“Not this again.” He shook his head as frustration pooled on his face. “I’ve told you a million times, I don’t fucking care.”

His raised voice now grabbed everyone’s attention, making me nervous and jittery in seconds.

“I had my reasons?”

“You keep your reasons to yourself. And don’t waste my time again.”

Before I could protest, he turned around, wrapping an arm around the girl. Meanwhile, I stood there with everyone’s eyes on me while I watched him walk away again.

I could feel the familiar sting in my heart. It wasn’t the first time he’d behaved that way. Every time I brought up the topic, he would suddenly turn into an asshole and leave right away. I didn’t know what to do or say to make him listen to me.

I raked my hand through my hair and left the room.

Just then Monica came out from her class, and from one look of my face she could easily tell what happened. She engulfed me in a hug as we made our way out and walked to the park. The warm sunlight hit my skin, but it didn’t do anything for my cold heart.

Tears threatened to spill from my eyes, but I wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction. Never.

“He didn’t listen, did he?” she asked, even though she knew the answer.

I shook my head in response as we took seats on one of the empty benches.

She sighed heavily. “Let it go, Lisa. It’s not like you two are in love and you must get him back.”

Love.

She just unintentionally revealed one of my deepest secrets. Something I never shared with anyone.

Was I in love with Aiden? Yes.

Did him not being in love with me always break my heart bit by bit? Yes.

But was love making me so blind that I was holding onto him so much that I might hurt myself further? I didn’t know.

“Just ignore him. He’s not worth it, Lisa.”

I wished I could take her advice, but deep down I knew I would be lying to both of us if I said I would let this matter go.

Because deep down, I wanted to keep trying and trying until I reached my goal.

I didn’t know if Aiden loved me or not. Would he ever fall in love with me? I had no answer to that either. All I wanted was his forgiveness and friendship.

Because I was willing to lose a lover but not my best friend.

I didn’t know what it felt like going through a break-up, but I did know when you lost your best friend, your whole world became dark and empty. And for me, Aiden would always be the light of my life.

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