Page 31 of Britain

I shake my head and hold out my hand as he tries to get close to me. “No…stay back.” There’s a ringing in my ears, my heart is racing, and my stomach is a giant knot.

“Brit, you’re scaring me.”

I need to get out of here—humiliation is beginning to set in. “I-I’m okay. I just need a minute.” He eyes me speculatively, but I try to give him a reassuring smile. “I promise I’m okay. I just need a minute.”

“Okay, I’ve got to go to the bathroom, but then we need to talk.” I nod and watch as he slowly gets up and walks backward toward the bathroom.

The moment the door shuts, I grab my tank top, slipping it on sans bra, and bolt for the stairs. I’ll come get the rest of my shit later. I slip on my shoes and grab my purse and keys before I rip open the door and rush out into the hall.

Luckily the elevator doors open as soon as I press the button, and I quickly step on. I hear Silas’s door open just as the doors shut. When I get to the parking garage, I hop in my car, throw it into reverse, and peel out. I can’t go home because Keith and Beth will be able to tell something is wrong and they’ll be in my business.

I drive and drive for a while before heading out to Old Country Road Thirty-Eight. It ends about two miles down; that’s always been my favorite spot. I can go there to be alone, which is what I want to be right now.

When I reach my spot, I shut off my car and stare out of the front window. The scent of earth from the surrounding farms fills my nose but doesn’t offer the comfort it normally does. The hate I feel for my mom comes roaring back; I grab my steering wheel with both hands and scream until my voice is hoarse.

I close my eyes and rest my head against the steering wheel. “Why couldn’t I just be normal?” I whisper.

The muffled ding of my phone pulls me from my thoughts. I pick it up and see texts from Silas, and I see that I’ve missed a couple of calls from him too.

Silas: Why did you leave like that?

Silas: We need to talk.

Great, there’s the kiss of death right there. Again my eyes burn, but I won’t let tears fall.

Silas: Britain you need to call me.

Silas: I’m serious. Don’t shut me out right now.

I start typing away a reply.

Britain: I just need some time to think.

Silas: Think with me, talk to me. Let me help you.

I toss my phone in the passenger seat and climb out of my car. I walk around the front end and move to the end of the road. “I hate you, Mom,” I whisper. “Thank you for breaking something inside of me.”

Chapter Fourteen

Britain

I climb back inside my car and decide to head home. I just want to crawl into bed and forget today ever happened. I spot Silas’s Porsche in front of the house, as I pull down my street. When I pull into the driveway, I climb out of my car.

I hear a door slam and turn to find Silas walking up the driveway toward me. A part of me wants to turn and run from him, but I know I need to hear him out.

“Are you okay?” His silky-smooth voice is laced with worry.

My feet carry me of their own accord, right into Silas’s arms. I wrap my arms tightly around his waist, and let out a sigh of relief that he does the same. His lips touch my forehead, and that warm feeling flows through my body.

“I’m sorry I left,” I say quietly.

“I don’t care about that. I’m so sorry.”

I shake my head. “Sorry for what?”

He steps back from me. “This is my fault. I put your hand on me, and that triggered your reaction. I’ll never forgive myself.”

I step closer to him and grab his face. “This isn’t your fault.” He shakes his head, but I hold firm. “It’s not, but if you don’t want to be with me anymore, I can’t stop you. I still want to learn to be submissive for you. I still want to stay with you…if that’s what you still want?”

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