Page 4 of Britain

“Um…Yeah, I love the Bears, the Cubbies, and the Hawkeyes. My brothers and I go to Cubs games at least three times a year.”

“Good to know.” He leans in close. “Please don’t take this the wrong way, but…you like men, right? I only ask because I’d love your number but didn’t want to assume.”

I feel my hackles rise. “Uhh…assume what?”

He shrugs and at least has the intelligence to look a little embarrassed. “Well, the car thing and the way you look have been throwing me mixed signals, that’s all.”

Is this guy for real? “Excuse me?” I keep my voice steady, not wanting to upset the girls.

I should be sad or disappointed, but I’m so used to it by now that I don’t know why I got my hopes up even a little bit in the first place. Something like this always happens.

He pushes his sunglasses up on top of his head, and that’s when I see he’s got the darkest brown eyes I’ve ever seen. He looks me over and I don’t like it. “Well I mean, you don’t wear makeup or anything, but you don’t really dress anything like the women my sister dates, either. They’re called butch, right?”

On behalf of the sisterhood, I’m a little freaking pissed he said that. Aren’t we supposed to be loved for who we are and not what we look like or what we do?

“I have no idea,” I snap, “because I’m not a lesbian, but I’m sure your sister would be so proud how educated you are.”

He flinches and turns his head so he’s looking off somewhere in the distance. “Oh God, I’m so sorry. I feel like such an ass.”

When the girls are finished, I excuse us and take them inside to the bathroom to wash their hands. I’m so irritated right now, and it’s bullshit that I should change who I am so I don’t become the crazy cat lady.

Back outside, Alex is wiping off both kids and looks up at me. I paste on a fake smile. “We’re going to take off, but thanks for inviting us.”

“Okay yeah, sure. I’ll call the shop and bring up the Impala for you to see.” He leans in and gazes right into my eyes. “Again, I’m really sorry.

“That sounds good, and it’s fine—whatever.” The girls walk with me to the car and we head home.

***

Keith steps out onto the back deck and hands Beth her glass of wine and me my beer. I just told them the whole story about Alex. During dinner, Annie asked what a “wesbian” was and I spit my water all over the table. We told her that it means girls who like girls like her mommy likes her daddy, and she quickly moved on to another topic like any four-year-old girl would do.

“That motherfucker questioned your sexual orientation because of your job and the way you look…” Keith, forever my champion, is pissed right now. “And he told you that in front of his kids and mine?”

I nod my head, because I’m honestly scared to answer him. He’s really mad. Ever since I can remember, he’s always had my back. Don’t get me wrong, Marcus has too, but maybe because Keith is the oldest he’s always felt some duty to protect and watch over me.

Keith knows what happened to me even though he’s never brought it up. I also know that he hates my real mom.

Why did I have to meet Alex today? It stirred up shit that I was happy not thinking about…ever.

Keith squats in front of me and grabs my hands. “You’re fucking beautiful and you don’t need motherfucking makeup, or to do your goddamn hair. You know what’s even better? Your beauty on the inside is so much brighter than the outside. I hope he comes to the shop, because I’m gonna kick his ass.”

I blink away the tears that are filling my eyes. I don’t cry—I won’t allow myself to do it. When I was little and after everything happened, I cried all of the time. One night I listened at my parents’ door and heard them talk about how worried they were that all I did was cry and that maybe they needed to take me to the hospital. Somehow, I found the strength to dry my tears and never let them fall again.

“Keith, I’m okay—seriously, don’t do anything. I honestly doubt after what he assumed that I’ll ever talk to him again.”

He looks me over closely, and I know he can see the strength I pretend to have. I take a swig of my beer and cover my mouth as a burp slips past my lips. Keith just shakes his head. “You’re a pig.”

Just as Beth says, “Gross, Brit.”

“Sorry, guys. I needed to lighten the mood.” I drink down the rest of my beer. “I’m heading downstairs. Keith, I’ll see you at the shop in the morning. Night, Beth.” I hug my sister-in-law, kiss my brother’s cheek, and head inside and down the stairs to my little apartment.

Tomorrow’s a new day.

Chapter Three

Silas

My alarm clock goes off—the loud beeping causes me to open my eyes slowly. A soft warm body is tucked into mine. Fuck, I fell asleep and Dorie took it upon herself to spend the night. They don’t ever spend the night.

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