Heiress was sitting beside him, her tail twitching, her face saying to me Do something!
I moved to him, calling, “Jamie?”
His head came up, as did his torso.
I moved to stand in front of him, and the instant I did, he reached for me, grasping my hips and pulling me closer, between his legs.
He then held my hips and stared at my belly.
I rested a hand on the top of his head, gliding it down to the side, as I whispered, “Jamie, what’s the matter?”
He slid his hands up to span my ribs and tipped his head back to look at me.
“Dru is very excited about the plans you’re making for the brownstone.”
Oh, my Jamie.
I moved my hand again, to cup his jaw. “I could tell.”
“She says you’re not changing the library.”
I shook my head. “No. Rosalind gave that to you, so it will remain.”
He fell forward and buried his face in my stomach.
I wrapped both hands around his head. “Jamie.”
“I hate this,” he said into my stomach.
“You hate what?”
He tipped his head back to look up at me and put his chin to my stomach.
For Jamie, it was oddly boyish, and terribly sweet, but even so, it made me no less concerned, so I smoothed my hands over his hair as he answered, “I hate that I have to tell you this.”
My hands stopped moving. “Tell me what?”
“That sometimes, I miss her.”
I cupped his face in both hands, moaning, “Oh, my darling. Of course you do.”
“I wouldn’t change us, Nora.”
“I know, honey,” I whispered.
“The fact remains.”
“I know.”
“It’s excruciating to experience that loss, at the same time think, if it hadn’t happened, you would be alone. We would not have what we have. We wouldn’t have a future.”
Unfortunately, these horribly conflicting thoughts he was sure to have hadn’t occurred to me.
I brushed his hands aside so I could sit in his lap.
He wrapped his arms around me.
“And the fuck of it is, I can’t stand the thought of you being alone,” Jamie went on. “That’s the worst of it. You have so much love to give. It causes physical pain to think of you not having a man to give it to. It just gets worse, thinking that man would not be me.”