Page 87 of Guarded from Corruption

Oh. OH. The tears I’ve been battling all morning threaten to make an appearance. “That’s what I want, too. And… I’ll say yes. When it’s time.”

“Ah, Jade.” Emotion thickens his voice. “I love you so much.” He kisses me again before continuing, “And I will be here for you. Don’t ever think you’re asking too much. You aren’t. I would do anything for you.”

“You too.” This time I kiss him. “I’ll get stronger. And I’ll be there for you. When you have to travel, if you have a hard case, anything.”

Desire flares in Niall’s eyes, but he quickly tamps it. “I know you will, hun.” He pauses. “What do you want right now? A different movie? A new snack? Do you want to do some more online shopping for the apartment?”

All of those things sound nice, but there’s still something else I need to know. “What about my mother? Where is she?”

His gaze sweeps across my face, assessing. Then he replies, “She’s in a long-term psychiatric facility. But it’s really nice, not like a hospital. Some of the FBI counselors are meeting with her. They’re trying to figure out how much of the conditioning can be undone.”

“Oh.” My feelings about my mother are so complicated. There’s the pity and horror about what my father did to her, but it’s hard to erase the memories of how she treated me, even if it wasn’t her fault.

Niall seems to read my mind. “You don’t have to deal with it yet. In fact, I don’t think they’ll want you visiting yet. Not until her doctors come up with a treatment plan. So you can take your time deciding what you want to do. But I’ll support you no matter what you choose.”

Maybe it’s cowardly, but I’m relieved for the reprieve. “Okay.”

A soft knock sounds at the door, and Niall picks up his phone to glance at the screen. “Dante again,” he says with a small smile. “It looks like he’s bringing over more food.” He slides me off his lap and settles me back onto the couch, tucking the blanket around me again. “I’ll just go grab it and I’ll be right back.”

“No.” At his raised eyebrows, I add, “I want to see him. Dante. I know he’s stopped by a few times already.”

Kind Dante, who comes across as such a tough guy—all strong Italian features and intense looks and a commanding presence—but is really a big teddy bear inside.

“Okay, Jade.” Niall heads to the door, pausing halfway there to add, “There’s no rush. But everyone wants to see you when you’re ready. They all care about you so much, you know.”

“I want to see them, too.” Brushing away a few tears, I tell Niall firmly, “I’m ready. Seeing everyone… I think it’ll help.”

And it does. Despite the anxiety and sorrow I know won’t go away for a while, seeing all of Niall’s teammates helps. It reminds me that I’m not alone. That I do have a family, though it’s not the traditional kind. That after thirty-one years, I feel like I actually fit in.

They’re all so kind. So sweet. They treat me like the brothers and sister I always wished I had.

Dante comes in with his arms piled high with containers of soups and casseroles and the lasagna I never got yesterday. He says with a sheepish grin, “I might have mentioned to my mom that you were going through a tough time. So she sent me a bunch of recipes for comfort food. It might be too much, but…”

“It’s perfect.” I get up from the couch to hug him tightly. “I love it. Thank you. And I can’t wait to meet your mom. She sounds wonderful.”

Matt arrives next with a video game console and a stack of games in hand. “Nothing stressful,” he explains. “Just fun games for now. But I thought it might be a way to help get your mind off things.”

I tell him it’s a great idea, but only if he comes over to play with me, too.

Erik is his usual goofy self at first, sweeping me into a big hug and telling me to make sure to keep Niall on his toes. But then he sits next to me on the couch and tells me in a serious tone, “You ever want to talk, Jade, I’m here. Or if Niall’s not around and you want someone to keep you company, don’t hesitate to ask. Okay?”

I get teary at that, and Erik gets all flustered, patting me on the top of the head and making an excuse to check the security cameras around the perimeter again.

Xavier comes in with an intense expression, and he makes a beeline straight to me. “Don’t scare us like that again, Jade. Okay?” Then his expression softens, and he hands me a bag with a small stuffed lion inside. “Cause they’re brave like you,” he explains, and that’s enough to start me crying.

“It’s okay,” Niall reassures Xavier, who’s throwing panicked looks at Niall. “From what I understand, if a woman cries after getting a gift, it’s usually a good thing.”

Rhiannon shows up last, and the look in her eyes is almost my undoing. There’s admiration and compassion and an unspoken promise that I can talk to her about anything. As we sit together on the couch—Niall is thoughtfully busying himself in the kitchen making yet another platter of snacks—she tells me, “I know this is so hard. And I understand it can feel overwhelming at times. But you have us. You have Niall, who’s one of the best men I know. And you have me.”

Then her serious expression transforms to a smile. “And when you’re feeling up to it, we’ll have a ladies’ night. Wine. Charcuterie. And we can talk about Niall—she glances in his direction, smirking—and how soon he’ll pop the question.”

“Rhi,” Niall huffs at her from the kitchen. “Would it make any difference to tell you to mind your own business?”

She flashes a huge grin at him and replies brightly, “Nope.”

Once everyone’s gone, I’m a little tired and sink back against the couch cushions with a sigh. Not that talking to people is exactly hard, but there’s a bone-deep fatigue I can’t seem to shake.

A minute later, Niall comes back from the kitchen and places another tray on the coffee table, then sits down beside me. One hand massages the back of my neck, working at the knots embedded there. “Are you doing okay, hun? Was it too much?”

---