Page 34 of Guarded from Corruption

I think it must be a thing that happens when people couple up. All of a sudden, my previously happy to be single friends are encouraging me to date. They mention things like, wouldn’t you like to settle down and it’s nice to have someone to come home to every night and I know a nice woman from work, are you interested in meeting her?

It didn’t really sound that appealing, honestly. I thought I was fine as I was.

Was I, though? Or was I just waiting?

“That would be nice,” Jade tells TJ. “I’m not sure if I’ll…” Smile dipping, she trails off. “If I can, I’d love to.”

“We’ll figure it out.” I turn Jade toward me, fighting back the urge to smooth the tiny lines of stress from her forehead. “I’ll figure it out.”

She stares at me for a second, a depth of emotion in her gaze. Then she hugs me tightly. Half-muffled, she says into my chest, “I know you will.”

The trust in her voice nearly knocks me to my knees.

I can’t let Jade down.

Not just keeping her physically safe, though that’s the most important thing. I need to keep her safe from anything that could hurt her. Fear. Worry. Nightmares.

When I think about Jade hurting, I’m seized with a desperate need to do something, anything, to make her feel better.

Which is why I end up leading her out of the barn just as the sun finally sets. The sky is an inky blue-black lit with wide swathes of stars, one of my favorite things about living outside the city. Light and music spills through the open doors of the barn, along with the happy chatter of my teammates and friends.

We stop once we get to the path leading back to the house. It’s newly lined with twinkly solar lights, courtesy of Dante’s mom, who sent them as a housewarming present. I overheard him talking to her on the phone, saying in a perplexed tone, “Mom. It’s a security company. Why do we need solar lights?”

I wasn’t sure either, but I have to admit they look nice.

“Is everything okay?” Jade’s delicate features are a contrast of light and shadow. Her brows wing up in concern. “Is something wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Okay?” Her tone makes it clear she doesn’t believe me. “Then why did you rush us out of there? Did I say something?”

Shit. Now she’s worried and that’s the last thing I want. “No, Jade.” Lifting her hand, I stroke my thumb across the back of it. “I could tell you were getting uncomfortable in there.”

“I wasn’t.” But it’s too quick to be the truth. And I saw her face paling as more of our friends from San Antonio arrived. Not that Jade was rude or unpleasant about it, but with each introduction, she shrank into herself a little more.

My voice gentles. “It’s okay if you were. Conor, Erin, Harley, Boone—they’re all great people, but you don’t know them yet. Not really. And I know my team is still new?—”

“I like your team. Especially Rhiannon. And they don’t make me uncomfortable.”

“Maybe not.” My arm goes around her shoulder, and I tuck Jade into my side. “But it’s okay to need a break. So I thought we could go inside. Watch a movie. Isn’t there a new one on Netflix that you want to watch?”

“But—” She turns her head to peer up at me. In the moonlight, her eyes sparkle like topaz. “Your friends. And the party. I don’t want you to miss it. This is a celebration for your new team. You should be there.”

I follow her gaze as it drifts to the barn. Inside, there’s a small crowd of people around Dante at the grill, Rhiannon is taking on Erik at cornhole, and Xavier is dealing out cards with a flourish to Harley, Boone, Conor, and Erin.

Hopefully they’re not using actual money. Xavier is a secret card shark and everyone on the team has already learned never to play poker against him.

Looking back at Jade, I tell her the absolute truth. “I’d rather spend my time with you.”

“Oh.” Her lips curve up. “I would too.”

So we end up back at the apartment, in our usual positions on the couch—Jade on one cushion and me on the one beside her. It’s closer than when she first got here, when I sat clear over at the other end of the couch, not wanting to crowd her. But still not close; there’s still a good twelve inches between us.

Her favorite blanket—well, it’s my blanket, but she’s claimed it—is tucked over her lap, which always makes me smile. My mom made it for me during her crocheting phase and she’d be thrilled to know it’s getting good use.

As Jade leans back against the couch, she lets out a small sigh and visibly relaxes. Which I’m glad to see, but it makes me feel like crap for suggesting we go out to the barn in the first place.

I thought it would be good for her, but I’m not a counselor. What do I know? Maybe I just made things worse. Took away some of the security Jade feels here.

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