Page 130 of Jesse's Girl

I lift my gaze. “Dude. No. It wasn’t?—”

“Don’t dude me, bro.” He squints. “You fucked my sister, you kept it a secret from me for weeks, and now I’m the last one to find out? Even fucking Mrs. Nicolosi knew before I did. We’re supposed to be best friends!”

I swallow. “She saw us in Seattle. We didn’t mean for it to shake out like this.”

“Oh, yeah? And how did you mean for it to shake out, Jess? Were you ever gonna tell me?”

I rub my forehead. “I dunno. But we weren’t trying to hurt you. It was never supposed to end up like this. Never supposed to be more than just…” I trail off, clenching my jaw. I can’t tell him it was supposed to be just sex.

His face falls. “So it’s more now? You care about her?”

“I’ve always cared about Ada. You know that.”

“You know what I’m asking, Jesse,” he says, giving me a warning look.

I press my lips together. I haven’t even told Ada how I feel.

He furrows his brow. “You have feelings for her?”

“Yeah,” I admit on a harsh breath. “I do… I have feelings for her.”

“Fucking hell.” He turns away, opening the driver’s side door. “Well, sounds like you two need to… I don’t even know. I gotta go. I need some time to cool off. Tell Mom and Dad I’ll call them later.”

“Marcus—”

“Just figure your shit out, man.”

28

ADA

When Jesse hadn’t come back inside after a couple of minutes, I’d gone after him, stopping short just outside the front door when I caught a glimpse of his back and heard Marcus’ angry voice. Knowing I was tucked out of view thanks to the garage, I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. I shouldn’t have stayed, but when someone asks the man you’re in love with if he has feelings for you… well, it’s hard to make yourself leave before finding out the answer. My dumb heart was frozen, hoping against all reason he’d say yes.

And then his words nearly took me down.

“I do… I have feelings for her.”

That single piece of information simultaneously lobbed me high in the sky and slammed me into the ground. My knees felt like they were made of sand, so I slumped down on the weathered porch, sitting with my back against the wall beside the front door. And there I remain, rooted to the spot—paralyzed by the futility of loving Jesse when I’ve known I’d lose him from the start.

It doesn’t matter how he feels. How we feel. There’s no future for us.

Marcus’ car peels out of the driveway and Jesse turns back toward the house, looking exhausted. When he sees me, he stops in his tracks.

I swallow.

He walks to the bottom of the porch steps, putting his hands in his pockets. “How much did you overhear?”

“Enough,” I say, my voice wavering as I force myself to my feet. I glance over my shoulder and descend the steps so my parents won’t overhear us. Facing him in the driveway, I’m somehow both desperate to reach for him and determined not to. “Jess, we fucked this up.”

Hurt touches his brow. “Yeah.”

“It got out of hand. We got out of hand. Now we’ve hurt Marcus… and for what? Some incredible sex?”

He looks stung. “Don’t say that shit.”

“That’s all this was ever supposed to be, Jesse.”

“But we both know it’s more,” he says, shaking his head. “It’s been more than that for a while.”