Page 119 of Capuleto

I may be the one with big balls, but yours are going to be drained dry.

His screams the next morning were epic. My punishment was too. But it was worth it, I still laughed when I remembered it.

The swinging doors opened, and a doctor, who must have been around fifty years old, called my last name. I stood up like a spring.

"Are you Mr. Capuleto?"

"That's right."

"Your wife has a severe infection, but fortunately, you brought her in time and it hasn’t worsened." I didn't know if I should be happy about the news or not, but I admit I felt relieved. "Due to her high fever, we’ll keep her hospitalized until it subsides, and you can take her home. We’ve administered penicillin because it’s the safest for her condition."

"Her condition?" I questioned, with a knot tightening in my throat.

"Yes, excuse me. Congratulations, Mr. Capuleto, your wife is pregnant."

The news felt like rubbing nettles on my balls again. No, damn it, it couldn’t be!

"Are you sure? Couldn’t there be a mistake with the results?"

The doctor frowned at me.

"There’s no mistake."

"What if you redo the blood work? Maybe it’s a false positive."

"This isn’t COVID, Mr. Capuleto. Your wife is expecting a baby. It’s very early, so we didn’t administer azithromycin or clarithromycin. Some studies associate these antibiotics with an increased risk of miscarriage. There’s no record of any penicillin allergy in your wife’s medical history, can you confirm that?"

"No idea, if that’s what it says, then that’s it. We’ve only been married a short time; we haven’t talked about our allergies. Damn it, damn it, damn it!"

I was so shocked I could barely process it.

"Male panic attacks about pregnancy are more common than you think. If you need any kind of anxiolytic, just ask. I recommend you sit down, drink some water, and breathe. The most prudent thing is not to tell the family until after the first three months. I don’t mean to stress you more than you already are, it’s just a precaution. Most pregnancies go well, but it’s better to wait until the fetus is stable. Once the room is ready, we’ll move your wife to a regular room. You can keep waiting in the waiting room. Do you want that anxiolytic? You seem agitated." I shook my head.

"I’ll be fine; I wasn’t expecting news like this. Thank you, doctor."

"You’re welcome. One more thing, I was told you don’t know how she got that wound, that you were traveling when it happened, is that right?"

"Exactly. I came back and found her burning up in bed." Her look was suspicious. "Is there a problem?"

"It seems a bit strange to me; if I didn’t know it was impossible, I’d say the wound looks like it was caused by a bullet. I spent some time volunteering with Doctors Without Borders in Uganda, and I’m very familiar with that type of skin laceration." I stood my ground, it wasn’t a hole, so it could have been caused by something else.

"You’re mistaken; we don’t have guns at home."

"Yeah, I guess you wouldn’t try to shoot her for telling you she was pregnant... Excuse the suggestion, but with so many cases of domestic violence today, one never knows what to think."

"I would never harm her," I replied without a hint of humor. "I already told you we just got married."

"Uh-huh, and she didn’t mention anything over the phone? It’s strange she didn’t tell you about such a nasty wound."

"That’s because you don’t know my wife. Nikita is a very tough person; she probably didn’t think it was important. I don’t mention it either if I stub my pinky toe against a door frame."

"I see, Mr. Capuleto. I’ll continue investigating and will ask your wife when she regains consciousness." Her tone was one of warning. I didn’t like her insinuation at all. "Excuse me."

The doctor left, and I went straight to the chair, not knowing what the hell I was going to do.

A child! A damn child!

I had a serious problem.

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