Page 47 of Smoky Lake

“Go on,” he said grimly.

“Someone ran toward me and said an ambulance was coming. I still keep in touch with that kind man, Billy Ellis. He was a farmer taking a load of pumpkins to a market. Anyway… he stayed with me until the ambulance came, and then my parents met me at the hospital. I was in the hospital for almost a month while they did a bunch of surgeries on me to reconstruct my hip.”

She paused to take another long breath, and this time she shot a quick glance at Gil. His jaw was set, his knuckles tight on the steering wheel. “What happened to that fucker?”

“He was convicted, with a hate crime enhancement. He’s still in prison. I get updates from the DA’s office. He was a repeat offender who had a record of drug use and racist hate crimes. When he abducted me, he was very high on meth.”

“Did you testify against him?”

“Yes, but my identity was protected. There were nasty threats phoned into the courthouse. My parents tried to keep that from me, but I knew.”

“Jesus, Ani. And you were only twelve?”

“Yes. It was…traumatic, obviously. But I also had a lot of help. I’ll never forget Billy Ellis. I still write him letters, and he writes back. The nurses and surgeons at the hospital, the physical therapists. The prosecutors. The judge. It’s incredible to watch good people try to repair the damage one fucked-up person left behind. That’s why I decided to become a doctor.”

“Pay it forward?”

“Yes, more or less. So many people were there for me. I wanted to do the same. My friends really rallied around me. After I went back to school, Molly and Lila never let me be alone. Other kids would tease me because I had to wear a brace for a while. Plus, I was different. Before the attack, I was very happy-go-lucky, I never worried about anything except, like, can I carry off a studded leather belt, or is it cooler to wear one earring or both. I ate lunch with the popular girls and wanted to be a cheerleader in high school. After I got home from the hospital, I wasn’t as much fun. I found out who my true friends were. Molly and Lila.”

“Not Charlie?”

“Charlie moved to our town later, when her father went on trial. Lucky her, that’s when she got to join our little crew of misfits.”

He smiled at that, and they drove for a while in silence while he absorbed the story she’d just told. “You’re not bitter,” he finally said.

“What makes you say that? I used to stay awake at night imagining how I’d get revenge. Or reenacting it, but this time grabbing the gun and shooting him in the knee. In med school, I hated the ER and surgery rotations. Very triggering, seeing gunshot wounds. I think about how my life changed after what happened, and how much that fucker has to answer for.” She heard the anger running through her voice. “And I wonder if the experience affected…well, you don’t need to know about that.”

“About what? Tell me. Why stop now? We still have a long drive.”

But she’d shared enough of her trauma without delving into baby-land. “Nope, I think I’ve blabbed on enough for now.”

She could tell he was disappointed. Too bad. She’d spilled her guts, now it was his turn.

“I just told you a very personal story, and you have to pay up. Fair’s fair. Tell me something that changed your life forever.”

“Give me a minute, I need to think on that one.”

As he pondered, she let her gaze linger on his strong forearms, the scatter of dark hair, the corded muscles. He was so fit, and she was so…broken.

Not broken, whispered a stubborn, secret part of her. You’re here, aren’t you?

“Being born,” Gil finally said.

She let out a gurgle of laughter. “Being born changed your life forever? I suppose that’s hard to argue with.”

“I know it sounds funny, but it’s true. I was born first. Then came Lachlan. My entire life was shaped by that fact.”

“The fact that you were born first?”

“Yes, because I felt responsible for Lachlan. But also because of Lachlan. He’s brilliant and a genius. Dreamy, always working on something in his head. We didn’t fight. If I tried to, if I was angry about something, he just wouldn’t fight back. I’d have to go take it up with the punching bag our dad got me. Lachlan is like…I don’t know, a natural-born saint. He’s better than most other human beings. Definitely better than me.”

She couldn’t agree with that, not for a second, not after everything Gil had done for her. “But you’re the one who protects him.”

“Yes, at least I did when we were growing up. I still do when he needs me. But he’s a grown man now and it doesn’t happen that often.”

She thought about how Lachlan had fought off his ambusher thanks to a move Gil had taught him. Gil was still protecting him, even from a distance.

“Why aren’t you married?” The question slipped out without her thinking about it. It had crossed her mind before now, but it had always felt inappropriate. Then she sucked in a breath. “Or are you?”

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