Page 82 of Calico Descending

What happened with Cadmus wasn’t a mistake, I’m certain of that now, as I’ve watched him slowly reconnect over the last couple days. Though, he still has his moments, particularly at night, when dreams seem to transport him back to those tunnels. Those nights, he wakes, bellowing my name, and he wraps himself around me, until he falls back asleep. For the most part, though, he’s relaxed somewhat, the beauty of this place working its magic on his state of mind. My hope is, in time, we can all move on from the trauma we suffered together.

It wasn’t out of necessity, or because I was programmed by Calico to be shared by these men, that I offered myself to him. What I did for Cadmus was born out of compassion. Something beyond flesh and fantasies. A concept that would’ve been rejected in the world my mother grew up in, where the power of human touch was thought to be silly magic likened to witchcraft.

One might argue that’s how we arrived in this world, where rampant cruelty has stripped us of such basic needs of contact and affection. The one thing that separates us from other animals, and without it, we are nothing more than empty shells waiting to be swept away. Maybe we evolved into this violence.

This evening, Valdys has joined Titus on the hunt for food, hoping to double the bounty for our travels, leaving me with Cadmus. Even in his moments of play and laughter, Valdys has remained ever vigilant. Always watching. Waiting. As much as we’ve grown to love this little oasis, he insists that we leave at first light.

The fire crackles as I sit beside it, my legs tucked into my body, watching Cadmus emerge from the pool. He shakes off the water, before toppling beside me on the dirt, and I giggle as cold drops from his body shower me.

As he settles at my side, I elbow him in the arm. “How are you? Feeling better?”

“I have moments … it’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s a dream. Like here. Right now with you. I’m waiting for the world to split open to a dark cavernous hole and suck me in.”

“Verisimilitude.”

“What?”

“When my father died, I used to have horrible daydreams, too. I swear I’d see him, sometimes, like a mirage in the desert. My mother told me that if my father ever spoke that word to me in one of my dreams, that it likely wasn’t him, because he could neither say, nor knew, the meaning of the word.”

Cadmus smiles at that and gives a nod. “Veri … simi …”

“Verisimilitude.”

“Verisimilitude.” He repeats the word and hikes a knee up, resting his elbow atop of it. “Now, how does that help me?”

“It’s not for you. It’s for me. If ever I ask if you’re okay, and you tell me that word, I’ll know it’s really you in there. Assuming you remember how to say it.” I brush my finger over the stubble of hair on his head. “If not, I’ll know to wrap you in my arms and hang on to you, until you come back.”

His smile stretches, and he links his thick fingers into mine. “Verisimilitude.”

A sound echoes through the canyon, and I snap my head up.

Cadmus seems to have heard it, too, as he sits forward, scanning the waters.

Another sound, much like the first, reverberates again, like a distant roar, and I listen carefully, wondering if it’s human. Footsteps splashing through water arrives from the left of me, and I push to a stand, watching a figure stumble into the camp.

Chest heaving, Titus trips, tumbles to the ground, and pushes back to his feet. As he nears the fire, I take notice of the blood glistening off his body.

“Titus? Where’s Valdys?” I search beyond him, but there’s nothing except empty darkness. “Where is he? Where’s Valdys?”

His face screws up in such a way that makes my stomach sink with dread. Terror pulses through my veins, and at the sound of approaching footsteps, I back away on instinct.

No. Please, God, no.

Five Legion soldiers step into view, and as they draw near, Cadmus pushes me behind him. All five carry guns, and those spears they use back in Calico to subdue the Alphas.

Ones they must’ve stabbed into Titus, because he wavers on his knees, until he collapses in the dirt.

My heart is slamming against my ribs, as there’s no sign of Valdys. “Where is he! What did you bastards do with him?”

Stepping between the soldiers is a smaller man, the sight of whom thrums panic through my muscles. Donned in the same black uniform as the soldiers, Doctor Tims is almost unrecognizable, if not for his snake-like smile. “Good evening.” He glances around the camp, and his beady eyes behind those thin glasses fall on me again. “Beautiful spot you’ve chosen to make camp.”

“Where is he?”

“Who, Valdys? He’s on his way back to Calico.”

Dread churns and twists in my gut. Tears well in my eyes, as the world grows heavy around me, and I sink to my knees. “No.” The whole universe feels as if it’s caved in on me, and I wonder if it’s best that I don’t fight them. That I let them take me back to that place, as well, because at least I’d be near him. Even if they take joy in tormenting the two of us, keeping us apart, I’ll be near him.

“Where’s Neela?”

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