Page 77 of Calico Descending

His gaze lifts to mine, and I recoil at that, the cold, creeping sensation settling inside my chest. “All across her naked body were … all these … small, clear circular sacs clustered together. Like eggs. All stuck to her skin. Pulsing, like they were feeding off her. Like she was keeping them alive. And those faceless things were eating them.” He swallows again, lips peeled back in disgust. “I picked one of them up, and there was a fetus inside of it. A small, unformed baby with no face. It was attached to a cord, and it moved, like it was breathing, somehow.”

Hand pressed to my mouth, I shake my head, crystals of ice turning my spine stiff and cold.

“She was crying. Begging me to help her. She reached out for me. But then those faceless things … it’s like they knew I was there for something. That I was there to take something from them. I could feel them shifting around me. Getting restless. I could feel it on the back of my neck.” He reaches around to rub his nape and I notice he’s still trembling. “I ran out of there. Through those tunnels. I could hear them behind me. Growling. Scratching at the cement. I knew they weren’t going to let me leave. At first, I couldn’t find my way back. I was running through dark tunnels, searching for the rope. Finally, I found it. I hooked myself on. When I scanned the flashlight, they were all standing around me. Thousands of them, packed in either direction. I yanked the rope to send me back up, but it didn’t move. So I pulled myself up, and those things started after me, scratching and clawing at my legs and arms, trying to pull me back down with them.” He pauses to rub one of the scars on his arm, and I study it, noting the jagged nature of the wound, as if little needles were lodged into his skin. “Everything went black. When I woke up, Valdys and Titus were standing outside the door.”

Eyes brimming with tears, he lowers his gaze and shakes his head. “I swear she looked like you. And I left her there. I fucking left you.”

The sight of him brings tears to my eyes, and I reach out to touch him, but he flinches away from me.

“Cadmus, I’m right here. You didn’t leave me.”

A tear spills from the corner of his eye as he looks up at me. “I don’t know if I dreamed it all. If it’s all in my head, or real.”

It’s hard to say, when it comes to Calico. So many things I thought were real, like my sister surviving her gunshot wound, turned out to be lies. Nothing but a trick. That’s the nature of the place. They toyed with our minds. They made us crazy.

“You need some water. And food. We made a camp.” The only thing that could exacerbate his delirium is dehydration. I slide off the canteen I strapped across my body and open it up, offering him a drink.

He hesitates at first, but snatches it from my hand, and tips it back to gulp the fluids. The water dribbles down his throat, and in seconds, it’s gone.

“Are you hungry?”

He nods, wiping away the fluids from his face with the back of his hand.

A glance at Valdys, and I nod toward him, pushing to my feet, and all three of us exit the truck. Cadmus hobbles after, with Valdys following close behind, the tension in his muscles poised for an attack. When we reach the camp, darkness has settled over mountains, the waterfall lit only by the flicker of the fire we set earlier. Titus is still nowhere in sight.

I grab a piece of the jerky from the supply pack, offering it to Cadmus, whose skin still carries the dried blood from the battle with the marauders the night before. “Come to the water,” I urge him, and when I reach for his hand, he wrenches it away. “I just want to wash the blood off you, is all.”

He glances back at Valdys, as if he’s silently asking for permission, and I know something has shifted inside of him. The old Cadmus would’ve taken without asking--he made that clear, the night back in his room, when he insisted on having me one time. Scratching at his arm, he limps after me toward the pool, and Valdys stands by the edge, watching us, as I lead him deeper into the water. At chest level, I approach him cautiously, and when I set my hand to his arm, he twitches at the touch, but doesn’t push me away.

I scoop up some of the water and dump it over his skin, running my hand over the blood, the evidence of his carnage, down to his hands. The muscles in his arm contract beneath my palm, and I take note of how massive he is, even at his weakest. If he were so inclined, he could easily break me in half. So many scars mar his body—new ones with poorly healed edges that slip beneath my fingertips. The marks of recent tortures, the likes of which I can’t even fathom. There is no stretch of his skin that doesn’t bear the notches of punishment.

After another minute of scrubbing away the blood, his muscles seem to ease a bit, and maybe he’s even relaxed by my touch.

“I would’ve gone back for you,” he says, as I move around to his back. “I’d have been scared shitless, but I would’ve gone back down there for you.”

I lower my gaze, my heart aching at the thought of that, and I glance to the side, where Valdys watches on. “I wouldn’t have wanted you to,” I whisper.

“My mind is in hell, thinking about it. Imagining the things they’ve done to you.”

“It wasn’t me, Cadmus. I’m right here.”

“I still hear those screams. Every time I close my eyes, I hear them.”

“It could’ve been a trick. A game. They kept you in isolation.”

Chin to his chest, he shakes his head. “It was real. I felt it.”

I come around to his other arm, washing away the blood there, and I study the wound with the needle-like holes, running the pad of my thumb over it. “They’re so cruel and evil. They might’ve forced you to hallucinate. And hurt you while doing it.”

Dousing his shoulder, I run my hands over the long sinewy fibers of muscle, and feel his fingertips reach out beneath the water. Bunching my shirt, he draws me closer, as Valdys stands oblivious to his movements below the surface, and he runs his hand across my stomach. “I wanted to stay with you.”

Even after what he saw? Surely, he must be out of his mind. I can’t fathom the level of horror, watching such a thing.

“If I couldn’t have you here, maybe I could have you there.”

“Cadmus …” My voice is a warning, and I break from his touch, moving to the front of him, where Valdys can see me again.

“I forget what it feels like.” The wobble in his voice draws my gaze to his, and I can see a flicker of vacancy returning to them. Hopelessness, perhaps. “I forget how it feels to be human. To be touched.”