Page 30 of Calico Descending

“And where exactly did you … see what you think you saw?” His response is exactly as I expected, and if I’m not careful, it might be cause to send me off to the incinerators for real this time.

“In the girls’ bathroom outside of the Commissary.” I rub my wrist, my stomach churning with what I plan to ask him next. Much as I wish I could go back and rewind this awkward exchange, I can’t. At this point, he may think I’m trying to blackmail him, or threatening him. “Can I … make a deal with you, as well?”

He lifts up off his stool just enough to scoot it forward, and leans in, his proximity stirring the nausea in my stomach. “There is no deal with Shoshanna,” he says in a low voice, his eyes brimming with warning. “And even if there was, you’re an Alpha subject. I’d be out of my mind to do such a thing.”

“What … what do you mean by that? What makes me so different from the others?”

“You serve a different purpose. That’s the only thing that makes you different from the other savages here. Now …” Keeping his eyes on me, he reaches for my hand, resting his palm over top of it. “Should you say a word of this to anyone …” His palm tightens around my hand, crushing my bones, and when I let out a whimper, a flash of amusement dances across his otherwise stern eyes. “I will see to it that you are sent to the incinerators by day’s end. Are we clear?”

Attention shifting between him and my crushed hand, I fervently nod. “I won’t say a word.”

“Good.” Wheeling himself back down to the foot of the bed, he takes his place between my splayed legs. A cold metal object is inserted into me, more harshly than before, and I shift with discomfort as it scrapes over my insides.

“Hold still!” he barks up at me, as he cranks it open. Jabbing his fingers rougher than usual, he performs his exam, and I lie staring at the cracks in the ceiling, feeling the trickle of tears slide down my temples. He reaches for a long needle set out on the counter and removes the cap.

My breaths shudder out of me, while the rush of panic slams through my veins. One quick pinch, and the burning sets in, reaching up into my belly, like a flaming snake, making its way toward my chest. I cry out, seizing with the agony that radiates over my womb. Like broken glass scraping across my insides, the pain intensifies, shooting through my thighs and back.

“I’m not going to lie, girl,” he says, sniffing his gloves before he removes them. “Under any other circumstances, I would’ve made a deal with you.” He pats the inside of my thigh and pauses to run his hand up and down my skin. “But I suppose I’ll just have to keep that to myself.”

Another zap of pain jolts me off the pillow, and when I come back down, his face is the last thing I see before the blackness closes in.

Chapter 16

Present day

“Did you allow him to touch you?” Doctor Ericsson’s eyes drill into mine, as I lay bent over the round wooden barrel, my bare breasts pressed against the hard and unforgiving wood.

“No,” I answer through tears. Burns slice across my back, the damage only partially numbed by my body’s need to push the pain away. “He … approached me. In the kitchen.”

“And did you not tell him you were part of the Alpha Project?”

“I did.” I sniff and swallow, closing my eyes, as what must be blood trickles down my naked rib cage.

“And?”

“He forced me to touch him, anyway.”

“Lies,” he says through clenched teeth. “Lies!” Gaze angled upward, he gives a sharp nod.

“No!” My words fail to halt the searing flame that strikes my back, and I grip tight to the wooden barrel beneath me, tensing as the agony radiates along my spine, like needles jabbing the bone. I cry out, tears spilling onto my arm, as my whole body trembles.

Doctor Ericsson steps out of view, and I catch sight of Valdys, flanked by two Legion officers at either side of him, and Medusa, both sitting on chairs across from me. An audience to my humiliation.

The easy rise and fall of Valdys’s chest tells me he’s unaffected by my flogging. Perhaps even enjoying it, and I’m grateful for the helmet, so I don’t have to see his smug face.

“Because of you, we lost a very promising soldier. Because of you, we lost a female subject.” Apparently, Valdys let Dina go, and suddenly, I don’t feel so sorry for her anymore. “And because of your carelessness and curiosity, our Alpha was distracted. Do you realize the gravity of that? How many could’ve been hurt in his absence?”

I can’t take my eyes off Valdys, and the sight of what I surmise as apathy toward my punishment unravels something dark in my gut. “Perhaps he shouldn’t have been so stupid,” I blurt before I can stop myself.

Another hard crack comes down against my spine, rattling my teeth, and through tears, I catch the curling of Valdys’s fingers around the arm of the chair.

“I didn’t make him kill Dean. He enjoyed killing him,” I spit out.

A strike, so hot it feels cold, licks my flesh, and I grind my teeth, eyes screwing shut to tears, as I wait for the shock to numb it.

When I open my eyes again, I see Valdys shift in his chair.

“Valdys is trained to kill when necessary. That’s like saying I enjoy punishing you.”