Page 28 of Calico Descending

His helmet lifts toward the camera again.

“Please … “ Dean’s choked voice can hardly be heard over the growls rumbling from Valdys. “Please, do--”

The camera falls to the ground, bouncing back and forth, until it stills, facing upward and aimed at where Valdys holds an outstretched hand toward Dean’s hoisted body. The Legion officer’s black boots dangle above the lens and his chest curves out just enough that we can’t see his face.

In the next breath, Dean’s body crumples to the ground beside the camera, and where there should be a head is nothing but a bloody stump of meat and bone.

Gasps fill the room, and Doctor Ericsson leaps out of his chair. “What in God’s name!”

What must be Dina screaming in the background echoes over a tug at my throat that begs for me to scream, too.

The trembles begin mild, until my entire body is cold, hollow and shaking. The view begins to shrink before my eyes, the blackness widening it’s reach, pulling me into the void.

Chapter 15

Four years ago

From the window of the commissary, I stare out at the yard, where Bryani sits surrounded by her friends. Head tipped back, I watch a laugh rip from her throat, one that mirrors the other girls. They love her. Even if she looks thinner than when we first arrived at this place, it doesn’t seem to have broken her in the same way as it’s breaking me each day.

Three times a week, I report down to the labs for testing. I’ve asked her if she’s had to endure anything like it, and she assures me she hasn’t. Those are the only moments, in passing, that I steal the opportunity to talk to her, to see what her life has been here.

I can’t even say how long we’ve been here. The weather has shifted from scorching hot, to cooler in the day, so I’m guessing it’s winter, but the change from day to day is so subtle, I hardly notice anymore.

“Hey, you gonna stand there, or are you coming with us?” Neela comes up from behind me, and when I turn, she peers out the window, undoubtedly aware of what I was looking at moments ago.

“It’s better, you know,” she says, not bothering to look at me.

“What?”

“That you sever ties now. Makes it easier.”

“Makes what easier?” I frown back at her, trying to determine if she has as much nerve as I think. I’ve grown to like Neela over the weeks. She’s welcomed me into her group of friends, which is a necessity in this place. A loner here is basically dead. Within weeks, usually. If the bullies don’t get them, the rejection will, eventually. But her comment is crossing a line to which not even the comfort of belonging is immune.

Her gaze falls on me, appraising me for a moment, as if she’s gauging my temper, and she shakes her head. “Nothing. C’mon. They’re going to be gone.”

Rolling my eyes, I give one more glance toward my sister, who meets my gaze from across the yard and waves back at me. With a solemn smile, I nod, and follow after Neela, who leads me down to the girls’ bathroom.

A group of girls are gathered around a small hole in the wall, and Neela tells one of the girls to cut the lights out. Giggles echo through the stalls, cut short when Neela tells them, “Shhhh!” She kneels down and presses her face to the wall.

Voices can be heard on the other side of the barrier, where the utility room lies. Neela waves me over, and I crouch down beside her, considerably less enthusiastic about this, and peer through the hole.

On the other side, the lights flip on, and I see Shoshanna enter with one of the doctors I recognize as one of three who examine me every week. She strides across the room toward a table, and as if she’s done it a million times, she pulls down her pants and bends over for him. The doctor springs himself free, and seconds later, he’s buried inside of her, slamming his hips against her backside with the slap of skin, and grunts chasing each thrust.

She can’t be more than thirteen.

“I told you that bitch had privileges. Fucking a doc? When was the last time she was sent to the lab?”

“I want to see!” one of the girls beside me whispers. When she nudges me out of the way, I let her. I can’t stand to keep watching a grown man using a young girl that way, but Neela’s words strike a chord of curiosity.

“They don’t send her to the lab? She doesn’t undergo any testing?” I ask, scooting away from the wall to allow the other girls who gather for a peek.

“Fuck, no, she doesn’t. Couple bangs a week, and she’s needle free.”

I pause to absorb her words for a moment, and turn to see the girl spying on them pull away from the wall. “Done already. Can you believe that shit? Not even two whole minutes.”

Not even two whole minutes a few times a week, and she’s excused from having to report to the labs. It’s something I dread every week, and the churning in my stomach tells me it’s almost time.

“Every day at lunch they’re in there, fucking, done before the bell sounds.”

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