Page 81 of All My Heart

“I know what I'm doing,” I insisted. I was giving her space. If she wanted to see me, she'd reach out.

“I hope you know what you're doing,” Wes said. “You wouldn't want her to meet someone else and move on.”

I hadn't even thought about that. What if her douchebag ex confronted her as soon as she got back and convinced her he'd made a mistake. What if she gave him another chance? Something that felt like indigestion settled in my stomach.

Luna couldn't go back to him, could she? What if she liked one of the contractors she hired to fix up her new house. What if she had a special bond with the next man that helped her renovate a house?

I wanted to believe I was special, but that was being overconfident. I wasn't sure about anything anymore.

Conversation turned to the progress with the farm, and I spaced out until it was a good time to make my goodbyes.

On the way out, Dad walked with me. “It's never too late to talk to her.”

“Mmm,” I said noncommittally.

“You don't want her to get away if you're in love with her.”

I blinked against the sudden sting in my eyes. Was I that emotional that I wanted to cry? I needed to get home, and away from the scrutiny. I was afraid I wouldn't hold up.

When I got home, I sat on the porch with a beer, searching for Luna's name on social media, not feeling the cold. I remembered her talking about starting up business accounts when she got home. There were already several videos of the renovation of my cabin.

She'd asked permission to film but kept me mostly out of the shots. I was okay with that. I wanted to help her, and no one knew where my cabin was located.

But there was something about seeing her beautiful face light up when she talked about the renovations that made everything worse.

I could see her face, hear her voice, and the excitement in her tone. I missed her. I couldn't believe she was gone. And there was nothing I could do about it.

Would telling her that I was in love with her have changed anything when her family and her business was in Florida?

I rubbed the ache in my chest, trying to soothe the pain. Should I reach out to her and ask how it's going? Tell her I saw her videos, and she looked amazing?

Her page was new, but I could already see her style taking shape. She had posted a ton of pictures of design choices she liked with tips on when they worked best. I knew she'd been working on her brand, but this was so professional, and well thought out.

I was impressed. I couldn't disrupt what she had planned. I didn't want to mess this up for her. She'd let her family hold her back, and I wouldn't do the same.

A car pulled up, and a family got out. Kids ran to the hot tub yelling to their parents about it. I sighed, the pain in my chest deepening. I couldn't even enjoy the solitude. Not only wasn't Luna here, but someone else was already renting her cabin.

I needed to buy a new cabin on fifty acres where I wouldn't see any neighbors. But then again, I wouldn't have met Luna.

I went inside, taking in the upgrades, the touches that would forever remind me of my time with her.

I couldn't regret it, but I'd carry the memory of her with me forever. Would I ever see the hot tub next door and not think of Luna? That first day when I went over to confront her about her music and saw her naked?

It physically hurt to think of her. Time should make it easier. But there was something about this time of year, seeing the lights we'd strung on the cabin next door, lit for someone else, that was doing me in.

Luna touched everyone she met with light and happiness, and now she was spreading that joy in Florida to other people. Her ex would have to know he'd screwed up with her, that he'd let something amazing slip through his fingers.

But I didn't think flying down there was the right thing to do either. She needed space to open her business, to grow, and get better. And I needed to give it to her.

I picked up a paperback. After reading the same paragraph three times, I threw it on the covers next to me.

I swear the room smelled like her even though we usually slept in her cabin. She hadn't christened my new sheets or even tested out my shower. Why was that so important now?

There was nothing I could do about it. Me going there would only make things worse. Especially if she didn't feel the same way.

We were temporary, and our time was up.

Iworked at the farm on Christmas Eve, assisting with the last-minute tree shoppers.

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