They weren't at home feeling sorry for themselves.
On the bed, my eyes drifted shut as I thought about what our future could look like. I wanted to renovate the beach house with her. It could be our home base, or we could sell it and flip another one. Maybe I'd convince her to renovate homes in Florida and Maryland. We could do whatever we wanted. We didn't need to stay in one state.
There were so many hurdles. Did she feel the same way? And there were geographical concerns too. Would I be willing to move to Florida and only visit the family on the holidays?
I'd resigned from the military because I wanted something more, and I thought that was getting to know my family again. But what if the something more was Luna?
I didn't know how she felt, and that was holding me back from deciding. I still had the holidays to get through so I watched her videos on repeat, needing to hear her voice, and see her beautiful smile.
Before I finally went to sleep, I messaged her on social media.
Congratulations on the beach house. It's going to be amazing when you're done with it.
She looked amazing on video but I couldn't exactly say that. I could see the comments from men that already said the same.
I turned off the phone, knowing I would have a harder time sleeping if I was waiting for her message. What if none came?
She hadn't told me she'd gotten the house. That had to mean she wanted space, right? I tossed and turned. The only thing that finally got me to sleep was dreaming about us renovating the beach house together. That felt right.
CHAPTER 21
LUNA
Icouldn't believe I was home and renovating the beach cottage. Everything happened so fast because the owner was eager to sell, and I had my financial information ready to go. Thankfully the owner agreed to let me rent the home until settlement.
I signed the paperwork, got the keys for the house, and decided to film my initial walk-through of my new house. It had generated a ton of interest online.
I was still working for Dad, but I hoped I could slow down or work from home so I could focus on the house. Dad wasn't going to get the message about me leaving if I didn't make some serious changes. But those would have to come after the holidays.
My focus was the beach house, my social media presence, and contacting the few clients I'd picked up from my family's construction business.
I hoped excitement generated through online videos about my progress on the beach house would naturally increase clientele.
I'd already posted videos about the cabin renovation, and one with me walking through the beach house, showcasing the before images, and talking about my ideas for the renovation. There were so many renovation shows and videos online. I hoped that my ideas were unique enough for people to be interested in watching.
I loved documenting my journey. My followers were growing, and they seemed intrigued that I couldn't decide whether to sell or keep the house for myself. The more vulnerable I was, the more interested they were.
I was a natural at this, and for so long I worried it would be hard, or I wouldn't want to be on video. But it was fun and easy.
I loved making plans for the house, and I couldn't wait to create my vision. The more time I spent in it, the more I wanted this house to be mine. But I couldn't make money if I held onto every house I flipped.
I needed to generate a profit. I had plenty of time to think about it. I'd planned for four to six weeks’ worth of work before I could consider putting it on the market. I was also looking into getting a real estate license so I could be more in control.
I was excited about the future. I wasn't stuck working for my family. I had so much more to focus on. I wasn't worried that I could easily run into my cheating ex or that Axel had let me walk away from him so easily.
I wished that Axel would have asked me to stay. It didn't fit with my plans, and I had no idea how a long-distance relationship would work.
He never said his feelings changed for me, even though I felt it when we made love. There was something there, and it couldn't be just one-sided.
He also hadn't reached out much since I'd been back. There was no how are you doing? or I miss you. There was only the message on my social media page congratulating me on the house. But that was a text that anyone could have sent. It wasn't personal.
Any time I remembered that my phone had been silent, I refocused on the house and what I could do now to get started. There was wallpaper to remove so I rented a steamer and watched videos.
It was hot and sweaty work, but I was making progress. With the holidays, I wouldn't be able to hire any contractors or get to the store to pick up supplies. This was one thing I could do.
I think the video of me figuring out how I was going to remove the wallpaper resonated with people because so many decide to tackle this project on their own.
When I took breaks, I went out on the small, enclosed lanai on the back of the house and wished I could afford a pool. I'd given anything to jump into it after a long day.