Page 101 of Follow My Heart

He let out a shaky breath. “I got caught up with everything that was happening. Faith needed me.”

“Of course. I understand.” But I was worried about him and Faith.

“Listen, I’ve got to get some sleep. I need to be ready early in the morning if the judge grants our hearing request. Stacy doesn’t know anything about it. She’s going to be pissed.”

So he was worried about what Stacy thought about things, but not me. I tried not to be bitter, to understand what Ryder was going through, but it was hard.

I forced myself to ask the question even though I was afraid of the answer. “Are you planning to move to Virginia permanently?”

“I’ll do whatever it takes to make Faith’s life easier.”

“You’re a good dad,” I said even as my heart broke into a million tiny pieces. I told myself I wouldn’t jump into another relationship so quickly. Especially with a guy who was going through a divorce. But I hadn’t listened to myself. I’d fallen so hard, and it hurt.

“Thanks, Violet. I’ll let you go.”

There was no I’ll talk to you later or I’m so glad you called. He was just updating me because I’d reached out to him. Would he have reached out if I hadn’t? I didn’t want to know the answer to that.

“I’m here if you need me,” I said, my heart thumping heavily.

“Listen, Violet, I’m going to be busy with this custody stuff and Faith. I have to make sure she’s okay.”

“Of course. I wouldn’t want to be a burden for you.” I hated everything about the way this conversation was ending. “Good luck, Ryder.”

I love you. I wish I could be there for you. If only you’d let me in. But the problem was that he didn’t feel the same way about me that I felt about him. If he did, he wouldn’t be able to walk away so easily He’d want me by his side.

I hung up before he could say something that would hurt even more. I tried to breathe through the pain, but it was impossible. My breaths were coming in short pants, and my chest was tight.

The tears threatened to spill over. I wasn’t as important to Ryder as I thought. Not if he could dismiss me so easily.

The rest of the week, I buried myself in work. I went in early and stayed late under the guise of creating new flavors. But in reality, I couldn’t concentrate. I wasted so many ingredients because I kept messing up.

I wasn’t creating anything new and special because my heart wasn’t in it. When I created a new flavor, I was usually inspired by something in my environment. And for the first time since Ryder came into my life, nothing was inspirational.

I didn’t want to come up with a new flavor. I didn’t even care if the business went downhill. I was miserable.

On Friday, I was sitting in my office, pretending to stare at spreadsheets.

Morgan popped in to say, “Charlotte is here to see you.”

I’d forgotten that I’d scheduled an appointment with the marketing guru. I saw what she’d done for the Calloway farm and was excited to meet with her. But now? I didn’t have the brain capacity to talk to someone so happy and bubbly.

I should send her on her way.

Except she breezed into my office with a bright smile. “Violet. I’m so happy to see you. I just love your shop.”

I stood and tried to smile, but I was afraid it looked more like a grimace than anything else. “Thanks for coming in.”

I rushed to move the pile of boxes and papers that filled the guest chair. “Sorry, it’s been busy this week.”

I moved around the desk and sat behind it. What did Charlotte think of me? I was usually more put together than this.

“Teddy said something about Ryder going through a situation with his ex. Are you okay?” Charlotte said kindly.

Her words sent tears brimming to the surface, but I waved her off. If that’s all it was that would be okay, but it was so much more.

“It’s none of my business. I mean that’s what Teddy tells me all the time anyway.” For the first time, her smile fell short.

“How is it working with Teddy on the farm?” I asked, wanting to change the subject.

---