Page 100 of Living with Fire

“She told me you were the one that got her to call home. That true?”

My eyes flash up to him, eyebrows raised in surprise. I didn’t realize she’d shared that with her family. I made it clear to her it wasn’t me that got her to do anything. “She made a choice to call.”

Connor laughs like I’ve told him something absurd, shaking his head at me. “Man, she told me you were smart,” he says like he doesn’t believe it, and I’m not sure if I should be offended.

“Savanna didn’t realize she had a choice. In her mind, the only choice was keeping herself away from us. You made her open her eyes.” Connor leans forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees as he keeps his gaze on me. “If it weren’t for you, we still wouldn’t know where she was, or what she was doing. Besides being in Santa Rosé, anyway, thanks to that video.”

I drop my head backwards and look up at the ceiling. “That fuckin’ video.”

“As much as I never wanted to see my sister in her underwear, that fuckin’ video got her in touch with us, so I don’t view it as a bad thing,” he says gratefully.

I can’t agree with him. That video is what ultimately led Vincent to her, of that, I’m sure. It was the catalyst in putting her into this hospital bed.

I only found out the day of the video she hadn’t talked to her family since before she left, but I’m convinced I could have gotten her to call them if I’d had a little time. I know I could have made her feel comfortable enough she would have called them. Or we could have taken a weekend trip to Nevada, or Washington, and called them from there.

So I can’t feel good about the video. Not when she’s lying in a hospital bed with injuries I can’t fix with a first aid kit.

Connor must take my silence as a disagreement. “I get it, man. The video brought Vincent here. We all think it, even if we don’t know it for sure. But have you thought maybe it’s better this way? That piece of shit is dead now. He can’t hurt Savanna.”

Reaching for a water bottle on the bedside table, he opens the cap to take a sip, but first adds, “If that means she’s a little worse for wear for a bit, I gotta say, I’ll take it. Not trying to be a dick, but I’d rather this,” he gestures towards her, “than him still being out there hunting her down.”

Everything he said makes me want to lurch out of my chair, get in his face, and demand he take it back. My fingers curl around the arms of my chair until my knuckles turn white. It’s hard to see it that way. Every instinct tells me protecting Savanna, keeping every hair on her head injury free, is the way things need to work for me to be okay in life. It tears me apart inside to see her laying in this bed, hooked up to monitors, in a cast, in a sling, her face beat up and bruised all to hell.

But maybe, just maybe, Connor has a point. One I hadn’t considered before.

I think of the times Savanna was triggered around me, the look on her face, and in her eyes. She was petrified. And then there was the day at the taqueria where she passed out in my arms from the panic attack, caused because she thought Vincent would be able to find her with the video out there.

That’s what she was living with. Every day she had to deal with the fear he would turn up. She always had to look over her shoulder. That isn’t any way to live. I experienced it for a fraction of what she did, and I hated to see how it affected her. Going through weeks, months, or years, would have been impossible.

“I might be able to agree after she wakes up, but until then…” I trail off, releasing a breath that says it all, running a hand through my hair.

“Yeah,” he sighs heavily, sounding as tired as I feel. “I hear you.”

We’re both silent for a while, lost in our own thoughts, before Connor says, “She told me everything you did for her. For the record, I like you. We all do.”

Giving him a brief smile, I nod in acknowledgement. “That’s a good thing, because I’d really like to be a big part of her life if she’ll continue to have me.”

Connor laughs, takes a sip of his water, then puts it back on the table. “Man, if you heard her talk about you, you’d know she’d have you for as long as you’ll have her. And as much as we’d all like to see her come home, I think we all feel pretty good about her staying here if you’re around.”

That warms me from the inside out. It also lifts a weight that’s been sitting on my chest I didn’t realize I was carrying around. I feel it leave almost instantly, and despite everything, I’m grinning from ear to ear. “I’ll do everything in my power to keep her safe.”

“Good,” he says, settling back into his chair with a smile. “I’d prefer not to beat your ass, but don’t think I won’t if you hurt her.”

“I’d let you,” I tell him, and mean it.

CHAPTER 34

NATE

My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I lean back to fish it out.

Savanna’s dad and other brother, Devin, came by half an hour ago, but since I was there, the three of them decided to head out for a bite to eat. They’d planned on Devin sticking around, but I assured them they could all go out as a group and I’d keep my ass planted in the chair, promising to call if there was any change.

Connor whispered something to Devin when he looked like he was going to argue, and whatever it was made Devin agree to go without a fight. If I were to wager a guess, the conversation Connor and I had went a long way in him feeling comfortable leaving Savanna without one of them here.

I glance down at my phone’s lock screen and see I have a message from my mom. Pulling it up, I smile.

Mom: How’s my boy holding up?

---