Page 104 of Living with Fire

My mom waves a dismissive hand in my direction, then points back to the phone. “Shhh.”

The video is bouncing all around, making it obvious that Jordan is on the move through the crowd. It’s mostly dark then suddenly gets a lot brighter and I realize she’s climbing onto the stage, the camera pointed at Liam and Brody, both standing in the middle.

“The beautiful Jordan Miller, everyone,” Liam croons to the crowd through the mic, waving a hand graciously towards her. “Sorry gentlemen, she’s not the next one up for auction. And if she was, you’d need to get in line behind me.”

Jordan laughs, and I see her hand come out to swat Liam playfully in the arm. I can imagine the massive eye-roll she’s giving him right now. “Flirt.”

Liam grins at her, handing the microphone over while he takes the phone. Planned. This was all fucking planned. From my mom being here to answer her phone, to Jordan walking on stage. I’m gobsmacked.

The video angle switches then, and Liam’s face fills the screen while Jordan talks to the crowd in the background. He’s still wearing a shit eating grin, and when Brody shows up over his shoulder, the latter is sporting a matching one. All I can do is shake my head at them, but I’m also smiling. A real, genuine smile. The first in a couple of days.

These two fools. My brothers. I wouldn’t trade them for a single thing in this world.

“You ready, man?” Liam asks, wiggling his eyebrows at the camera.

My brow furrows. “For what?”

I swear the grins on both their faces get wider before they disappear. In their place is Jordan standing on the stage, but beyond her is the bar. Liam slowly pans from one side to the other, showing my mom and me the crowd.

A choking noise bubbles up my throat. The wave of emotion that enveloped me earlier is back, tenfold. The place is absolutely packed. So packed the firefighter in me worries about the fire code. In my wildest dreams, I never imagined it could be that full.

“Everyone say hi to Nate,” Jordan says from somewhere out of the camera’s view.

The entire place erupts in a chorus of hello’s, cheers, and whoops. At the overwhelming sound, my knees give out and I sink into the chair behind me. My mom follows me down, perching in a second chair that one of Savanna’s brothers brought in this morning, still holding the phone for me to watch.

I run one hand through my hair, the other rubbing my chin, completely speechless as I take in the sight. Words escape me. Thoughts evade me. There’s nothing but disbelief. And gratitude. That slams into me so hard I have to bow my head to take a deep breath that’s shaky at best.

The comforting touch of my mom lands on my back as she rubs up and down in a soothing motion. “I know, baby boy. I know.”

“Nate,” Liam says, and I lift my head to find the video back on him and Brody, Jordan having joined them. “We love you, man.”

All I can do is nod at him and press my fist to my chest because even if I had the words, they wouldn’t do this moment justice. Nothing I could say would convey how I’m feeling. Even telling them that I love them back seems dismal in comparison to what is happening in my heart. After facing some of the darkest days of my life, to have the love and support of my friends and family means the world to me.

It's not easy to be vulnerable. And had a pretty little blonde not walked into an elevator and declared men disgusting, filthy pigs, I may never have learned how to become vulnerable. How to feel safe showing what I always considered a weakness.

I reach over to her now, taking her hand in mine, my eyes sweeping over her. Things aren’t perfect. Neither of us is okay. I’m not delusional enough to think we’ll magically be okay the second her eyes open for good. There are going to be a lot of things that Savanna needs to work through, and I’ve got my own shit to deal with. But together? Together we can conquer it all.

I locate my sister and brothers’ faces in the phone and smile. With Savanna’s hand in mine, I finally find the calmness needed to say, “I love you guys, too. Thank you.”

CHAPTER 35

NATE

“Is anyone else hungry?” Connor asks the next day, and there’s an eruption of laughter around the room.

Even Savanna is giggling, the sound music to my ears, though I can tell she’s exhausted. “Some things never change, huh, Con?”

“I’m a growing boy!” he tells her, puffing his chest with pride.

Devin rolls his eyes. “You realize you’re a grown ass man, right?”

“Whatever. Who’s hungry? I’m starving. Dad? Dev? Let’s go get some lunch.”

I’m perched on a chair next to Savanna’s bed, my hand covering hers. Our fingers have been brushing each other’s for the last half an hour when she woke up, this time a lot more perky than the night before. Still exhausted, still medicated, but she’s done well for being this awake for so long.

I’m surprised Connor is trying to get everyone to go for lunch, but then maybe he realizes how tired she is.

“What?” Savanna’s dad, Byron, says. “No, I’m not hungry. You go ahead.”

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